Rope Knot

It's hard to find a reason where
It make sense enough to wanna still be here
I hate it here and I don't even care
I'd rather say I did my best and walk into the woods and feed a bear
It's like I have a type of pain that no one else can feel
And no matter how loud I yell nobody else can hear
It's like I'm here but I'm not really here and when I wake up everyday no matter what I feel tired and weird
Even ever since I was a kid it wouldn't make any sense to explain it even if I did
Ever since I could comprehend accomplishment it felt like something everybody else had I could never get
Everyday I'm just reminded nothings permanent except a dreary dullness of a constant motion blur effect
Drug addiction doesn't help it only worsens it cause when I sober up I'm just reminded of how worse it is
I ain't doing good but you ain't even gotta look
Life panned out like a Kawabata book
Got em shook in a rage but I'm working it
I think its time to get me off the stage and pull the curtain quick
I just wanna feel appreciated but I don't
Everything tell me to give it up but I just won't
Chair kicking, rope grippin' throat - Nope
I don't understand if this is real or it's a joke