Red Alert

Ain't just a player in this douche game, I'm an entrepreneur
Convincing married bitches to be dropping their shorts
The reason a dozen steaming husbands want a divorce
Ma'am, can you hold this? (baby squeal) Great, awesome, it's yours
Hold up a fucking Dunkin's with cops in the store
Right after winning Megabucks, like the fuck am I robbing it for?
Cops knock at the door, ain't no such option as court
Cuz you know how many times I've made bitches get lost in the forest?
Except with me that shit don't end like Hansel and Gretel
We can stand in a meadow, I'll smack you 'til you land in the ghetto
Got my feet at the wheel and fucking hands at the pedals
You ain't heard D's crazy? Yo, someone hand them a memo
I maybe a rook, but this rap game's found its king
Shoving MCs into pools when they're rocking pounds of bling
Steal your neighbor's speakers and bump this loud and big
Sampled Beethoven, exhumed him, and danced around in his powdered wig

(Chorus)
Putting bitch rappers on red alert
Lyrics got your mind spinning 'til your head'll hurt
Yeah, and you ain't never heard a better verse
Get a nurse cuz I'm killing it, putting rappers on red alert

Kid, I'm dumb enough to try to O.D. on Flinstones Chewables
As far as viruses go, I got a crotch- and a computer-ful
And even less suitable's the shit I browse at the cubicle
Narcoleptic with a foot fetish, cutting cuticles at funerals
I'm a WMD to struggling MCs
Looking to have the blood from their jugulars set free
Pissed I'm up to 9,110 sheep
Cuz I'm looking forward to fucking my haters' mothers in wet dreams
Craving the V, A, or the M; either way she's getting the fourth letter
And if it's the latter, shit's gonna feel like I force-fed her
English major, but can't be bothered to talk more better
Stay in bed 'til noon jerking it to Sage Steele on Sportscenter
And, man, unless you want the coroners to examine your skull
You'd best bounce quicker than tits on a mechanical bull
Shit, two hours ago this fucking handle was full
Another two hours of this shit I'mma be Anna Nicole

(Chorus)

And this ain't no edited, clean shit - getting Jiggy with it
Choking hookers at the Holiday Inn - getting Chingy with it
Beats, brains, and the flow, triple crown - getting Miggy with it
Beg to differ then this drive-by will leave you getting Biggie with it
And I'd like to pretend that rage runs in the family
But that shit's self-made, so go ahead punk, say something to scare me
I ain't troubled by planning to have a grave dug where you're standing
Sick fuck since I was twelve and raped one of my nannies
List of exes is as follows: fake sluts and a tranny
Halloween cost me life for murder and $8 for the candy
These cougars in the crowd got the stage flooded with panties -
Motherfucker, plus I save some for the grannies
Dealers like Sam's club, getting drugs in bulk shipments
Herb-mongering, curb-stomping in bitches, giving their skulls friction
I think my sanity's resigned on me, pulled a Nixon
Cuz I'm taking shits in toilets that are out of order like Pulp Fiction

(Chorus)