Raising the Bar (#3)

I live my life between these lines, seems I'm always redefined 'Cause they only see what's on the surface layer, free your mind
All these demons crawling on my ceiling got me feeling like it's feeding time
I open up my wounds and let 'em drink the wine
The god in me's creating, making time reverse
Can't be penny-pinching In a business you define your worth
At my apex, I'll be lookin' back from space squinting tryna find the Earth like its my final words
Word; I make a song and treat it like a message in a bottle
I make a song for every dream unfollowed
I make a song for every time I said some shit I didn't mean
Or every time I meant the shit, just tryna fill the cracks we've fallen in between
Non-religious but I purge my sins, work a pen, and lose my mind tryna find the meaning in the words of men
Loyalty's currency spent amongst deserving friends
From here, can't tell if I'm digging myself out or further in
I dig myself to the other side of the planet
Cause tsunamis plucking wings off a butterfly when it's flappin'
Running circles round 'em all, and trust I'm not even rappin'
This like talking in circles while justifying my actions
Got me crack whippin', tryna kill it like my last victim
Glass tippin' in the background like I'm ad-libbin'
Transitioned; now the change up got my fans trippin'
I tell 'em when you been through some shit you act different
I give a fuck about your top 5; if I ain't on the list, then it's nothing 'cause I'm top 5
You'd get it if we swapped lives
Ain't playing devils advocate, I been on god's side since the day that Pac died
Now loved ones try to question me like "who is he?"
They asked what changed, I say everything, including me
Murdered comfort, contentment, then caught death sleeping
Like I murdered love when I was caught my by my ex cheating
Murdered doubt and routine that I was neck-deep in
Murdered everything now work's the only one left breathing
Shepards lose their way and let the sheep explore
Feeling guilty, what's the verdict? This the people's court
I'm like a bad idea when it's reinforced
I'm like a bright idea when it seems ignored
I've won a couple things, but my ego's bored
I've lost everything, but who's keeping score?
We endured being poor
I'm another plane, this the baggage that I bring aboard, shit you seen before
Drugs, money, music; that's mi amor
That shit you fiending for, rinse, repeat, re-record
Easy for a preacher hardly practicing what he endorsed
Screaming t'ward deaf ears assuming meaning will be absorbed
My brains a haunted house with a squeaky door
Raise the dead like Ouija boards and raise the bar even more