Problematic

I'm problematic, I never tried my best
I'm not surprised every time I'm inside a mess
I never realised relationship's a type of stress
Not enough hours in the day to find time to rest

She wants me under the thumb, end of the index
Telling me to fuck off, wants a ring on her finger
But it's the little things... that make it happen
It's the little things that got me thinking back and I remember being happier

And I need to get back here
Still I've got your back f'ya
Sleeping with my back t'ya
Who am I to mentally batter'ya
Better back stare
Couple times a year I disappear
Only clogged my perseverance
Got my career interfering as my respect f'ya's turning into fear
I see it clearest when I'm here
Though I see blurred through a tear
I hurt everybody dear to me
So I let nobody near
Still I'm here

I want it all, and I know how to get it
Still I can see it hurts you more and more the more that I let it
Some say if you love 'em you should let 'em go and then regret it
Some say "don't be so pathetic"
I've always been the latter
I can't care, it doesn't matter
Who are you to have me handed over to you on a platter?
But I don't feel the same now
It's hard to walk away
Now I'm talking 'bout changing on the phone again late
Cos I ain't always been the same

But know I'm capable of change
But I don't wanna put you through all my mistakes along the way
I'm a coward and a fake
You know it pains me to say
It's me that's making you stay
In a place that you hate
The same place it was made
Erase the game in my name
They know my name in every rave
I'm home, home and away
Singing Home and Away
I fuckin' love it here
And I ain't never moving away
Unless you're moving away

I attract attention
The doctor says I lack it
I told him if you could package it, then I'd make a packet
Who'd have thought such a little bitch could make such a racket
I'm still backing one day I'll leave her gaff packing
I'm fuckin' knackered, man I put my back in
And looking back, did you leave?
Or did you send me packin'?
I can't remember but to me you was overreacting
But I can't remember man
I swear they think I'm acting, when my memory's blanking me
But my memory been messin' in me
You got me guessing my premise
I'm not the menace you know
No I'm the menace you don't
I don't remember you, no
I wouldn't know if we'd met
I wouldn't care if we don't
I'm a man of my own
That's why I'm back on my own
Heading back to the zones
Middle of the road, rag n' a bone
Lost my phone, second dome
Lost my dough, lost the girl - that's the world
Lost for words, lost my mate
Lost my way

I've lost a lot in my time
I've lost my mind a couple times
And I'm not sure it's even mine, when I find it
I've lost track
Lost tracks
Lost macks
Lost sacks
Lost 'nuff time tryna acquire it
My life becomes so tiring
Losing track of my diary
And when admirers admire me
I know I don't admire admirers
Live my life in the firing line
Or live my life as a lie
Love the ones you love for the things you love overnight