Pretty Angry (for J. Sheehan)

I wish I drank tequila
I wish I stayed up late
But lately when the Sandman comes
You know I just can wait
No, lately I can wait

And we packed up all your boxes
It's all been hauled away
I never stare at walls so bare
'Cause something always stays
Yeah, something of you stays

And I wanna shout from my guitar
Come out, come out wherever you are
The joke is over, open your eyes
A heart like yours, it never dies
And I found your keys behind your chair
I still can see you sitting there
This isn't funny; don't fool around
You let me go, you let me down

And I guess I'm still pretty angry
And I don't want to be
I don't know which was the bigger waste of time
Missing you or wishing, instead, it was me

I wish I walked on water
Pulling rabbits from my sleeve
Guessing cards and saving everyone
I wish I still believed
Oh I wish that I believed

That I could also channel voices
That I've endured the burning blade
That I could make some of your choices
Oh, I wish I weren't afraid
Of those choices that you've made

Like I could give you what you need
So ollie ollie oxen free
The game is up and I give in
So show yourself so that you can win
Come claim your prize and I don't care
I still can see you standing there
How could you leave, how could you lie?
You cut me off in mid-reply

And I guess I'm still pretty angry
And I don't want to be
I don't know which was the bigger waste of time
Missing you or wishing, instead, it was me

The will to win, the urge to race
I still can see it on your face
Thought I'd keep up but only crashed
I wasn't built to move that fast
Thought I could match you stride for stride
But I was on the other side
And holding onto the safety rail
With knuckles white, complexion pale
A cloud of dust and you were gone
Thought I would catch you later on
I limped behind, your race was won
But were you racing or on the run?
How you enjoyed, you loved to drive
And I'm destroyed 'cause I'm alive

And I guess I'm still pretty angry
And I don't want to be
I don't know which was the bigger waste of time
Missing you or wishing, instead, it was me

I guess I'm still pretty angry
And I don't want to be
I don't know which was the bigger waste of time
Missing you