Planning & Scheming

Michael Bacall :
Now, look
You can't look like you're trying to get her out of here before Christian Simonson shows up
But you've got to get her out of here before Christian Simonson shows up

Eli Roth :
What's the point?
They're going to Shanna's daddy's house at Lake L.B.J. and it's no guys
Absolutely no guys

Michael Bacall :
Okay
So after we bring the girls' drinks
In fairly rapid order, but not obvious
We order two more rounds of shots

Eli Roth :
You think they're gonna fall for that?

Michael Bacall :
We'll be very convincing
Now it's time to turn up the volume
No more fucking around
We go to Jäger shots

Eli Roth :
Man, they're not gonna drink Jäger shots
Michael Bacall :
Dude, as long as a guy's buying the booze, a fuckin' bitch will drink anything
C'mon, we can at least get one shot of Jäger down these fucking bitches' throats
After that, we'll see if they get another Jäger shot in them
You never know
That could be the shot that puts them past the point of "fuck it."

Eli Roth :
Then all of a sudden "no guys at the lake house"
Turns into a couple of guys at the lake house

Michael Bacall :
My point exactly
And I know I can at least get "Shanna Suck-my-banana" to do a fucking Buttery Nipple shot
What's Julia's sweet shot?

Eli Roth :
Key Lime Pie

Michael Bacall :
Oh, come on, dude
Even fucking Leroy Brown would do one more for dessert