Pillow Talking

[Intro: Lil Dicky]
Ayy, ayy, damn
L tapped twice on some ass, like grams
I just fucked, ay
Now what I'm doin'?

[Chorus: Lil Dicky]
I'm just pillow talkin' with a bitch, ayy
I'm just pillow talkin' with a bitch, ayy
(Do you fuck with the war?)
I just finished spazzin' on a bitch, ayy
Now I'm pillow talkin' with a bitch, ayy

[Verse 1: Lil Dicky & Girl]
I'm like, "Girl, that was great, talk about a connection"
"Am I alone in my praise, do you share my assessment?"
She like, "Heh, yeah, that was nice", (eh) "I enjoyed myself"
"Great", "Yeah"
She like, "Can you reach that shelf for my phone?"
"I'll take care the alarm"
I'm like, "Oh, for the mornin', like, to sleep?"
She like, "Yeah, heh, we just had sex", (eh) "What did you think?"
"I was just gonna fuck you and leave?"
"No, I— I hadn't thought that far ahead"
"But of course, can I get you a t-shirt—"
"Oh, can you not tickle my hair?" (eh)
"It's just a personal thing, it's not you"
"Okay, sorry for doin' it, heh"
"No, no, this just a personal thing, it's not you"
"Okay, cool" (eh)
"Yeah, uh, so, you're from Minnesota?"
"Only thing I know is that it's colder"
"Break it down, how's it compare to livin' in LA?"
"Well, I can't compare them, they're so different"
"You know what I'm sayin'?"
"Yeah, for sure"
She like, "Apples to oranges"
"Well, you can still compare them, but I hear you"
"Uh, what's the deal with your family? Got any siblings?"
She like, "I have a brother"
I'm like, "Oh, what he do?"
She like, "He in the Army"
"Oh, true"
"Uh, do you fuck with the war?"
She like, "Huh? What did you just say?"
"Uh, like, just now?", "Yeah"
"Do you fuck with the war?"
"No, I don't fuck with the war"
I'm like, "No, I don't fuck with the war!"
"Just don't know how to react to the forces"
"I should have just thanked you, of course it's not—"
"Uh, why would you thank me?"
"Uh, I guess I assumed it extended to families"

[Verse 2: Lil Dicky & Girl]
But, okay, while we're on the topic, I been actually thinkin'
About some shit, about the Army and Navy
What if tomorrow is the day that the fuckin' aliens came and invaded our nation?
Like, would we even be able to fuck with their shit?
Like, do we got the type of weaponry to fuck with their ships?
Or not at all, like, would they just walk up in this motherfucker
Laughin' at us, and blastin' at us
And makin' everybody disintegrate and assimilate without a hint of intimidation?
Or could we do some shit to be makin' they heart race?
Granted, I don't know the alien heart
But, you get what the fuck I'm sayin'? "Uhm"
Like what the fuck would it be like?
Would they be like "Earth go hard" (eh)
Or is it just another conquest? (oh)
Or would they be like, "Damn, Earth go hard" (eh)
They was harder than Simian
You ever talk to your brother about this, uh, type of stuff?
Then she like, "No"
I'm like, "Well, what you think?"
She like, "I don't concern myself with hypotheticals that couldn't be" (eh)
I'm like, "Girl, what you mean?"
She like, "I don't believe"
"In the war?", "In aliens"
"Oh, hold up, hold up, wait"
"Girl, what you sayin'?"
"That all of the life in the universe happens to be where you stand?"
"I– I guess"
"What an enormous coincidence that shit would be"
"Do you see what I'm sayin'?"
"I can't hear what you're sayin'"
"Well, the universe always expandin'" (eh)
"There are infinite galaxies" (infinite)
"Why would we be the anomaly?"
She like "That's no coincidence", (uh) "I call that shit God" (hold up)
I'm like "Oh, you're religious, bitch"
"You think it's all God?"
"No, I know it's all God"
"No, I know that there might be a God"
"First off, nobody knows there's a God"
"Girl, I think we should drop this" (eh)
"No, what's goin' on in your brain right now?"

[Verse 3: Lil Dicky, Girl & Brain]
Brain, ayy, Brain on some other shit though
I been all up in the club for a year, hey (Brain)
I been killin' shit, don't mind me, eh
Uh, I'm just top flight, ah
Uh, I could sure use a Sprite
I'm thirsty as fuck
Who gettin' money? That's Brain (Brain)
Who make decisions? That's Brain (That's Brain)
Who make the hits? That been Brain (Oh, that Brain?)
Who run this whole operation? That been Brain since—
Brain, can— can you just get back to the issue here?
Uh, really? Can you just remind the Brain?
You're such an idiot, we're talking about God and if He exists
Don't call Brain names, uh
The Brain couldn't recall
But if I'm not mistaken, this bitch to my left
Guaranteed there's a God
I believe in a God, yes
So, God never wrong?
God never wrong, right?
Heh, yeah, that's, like, the whole point
Brain, just get there, please
Hold up, so, God made the Earth
And God was like, hold up
This shit is borin'
It need more shit
God was like, "I'ma put dinosaurs on that bitch"
"Dinosaurs on that bitch"
Then He like, "Why'd I put dinosaurs on that shit?"
What is your brain even saying?
Can he get to the point?
Hold up, Brain, you just did it! Ah
God ain't wrong, what the fuck was He thinking?
About what? Bitch, the dinosaurs!
He made the Earth for them, but then He like, 'Nah'?
'Dinosaurs are just blah'? What's your point?
'I'ma cook up some blondes'?
Like, He was way off, I don't look like a dinosaur
Ho, them things thirty-five feet
I'm like five-foot-eleven (Up on Tinder, I'm six-foot)
Seen that Bronchiosaurus?
That thing fuckin' neck go to heaven (Good shit, Brain)
And that's just an expression, bitch
There ain't no heaven (eh)
Funny – I'm just messin', but if he ain't wrong
I guess this the exception
Can I talk now? Go ahead

[Verse 4: Lil Dicky & Girl]
Look, everything in life has purpose (eh)
You, chickens, a midget at a circus
What? I don't interpret
She like, ”That's not for me to determine”
So dinosaurs' purpose was to just die?
That's not for me to determine
But, okay – I'm just a person
Okay, but think of the root of the argument, girl (eh)
View how we started this, girl
Like, you don't believe in the aliens
Yeah, I just—
You confine God to Earth, girl, I find that shit salient
I just don't presume to know the plan
Bitch, me neither, but that's not what I've been sayin'
Well, what are you saying?
Why can't God fuck with aliens?
Why can't Earth be like a fuckin' small side project for this guy?
Okay, look, we just don't see eye to eye
Yeah, but logically, like, you don't believe in your side
Well, you're bringin' up fuckin' dinosaurs
Like, we could have shared the Earth with them, nobody knows
Yeah, there is hard soil evidence, girl
Like what's next, you don't fuck with Pangaea?
She like, "Let’s change the subject"
Okay, this bitch don't know 'bout Pangaea
Brain, leave it alone

[Verse 5: Lil Dicky & Girl]
Uh, I'm starvin' – are you hungry, by chance?
Oh, my God, I'm so hungry
Yes, do you wanna get a pizza?
Fuck yeah, Fuck yeah, I'm on it
Also, I'm sorry about that whole interrogation thing
Come on, dude, I'm a grown up (eh)
I'm capable of having intelligent conversations
Okay, I just— fuck it
Back to this pizza, I lean pepperoni
Ugh – sausage?
How can you eat that shit?
No, no, no, this not Domino's, this legit
It's high quality meat and shit
No, no, I'm vegetarian
Oh, right, well, we can get half pepperoni (eh)
And half of whatever you like
Ugh, ew, I can't have that shit in the same box
Uh, s— seriously? – Yeah
You're that against meat?
No, I'm that against us being gluttonous
Thinkin' that animals live on this earth to get eat
Okay, is it how we treat them?
Heh, that sure doesn't help
Okay – she like, ”I'm not opposed to us huntin'" (eh)
"But now we not trackin' them down"
"We just breed 'em to eat, that's disgustin'" (eh)
"You should honestly read on the subject"

[Verse 6: Lil Dicky, Girl & Brain]
All right, hold up
Just because we're not runnin' around with a bow and arrow
Doesn't mean we're not huntin' these chickens
We just set the place to do our huntin' intelligently enough
To manipulate these animals and get them to do exactly what we want
That's my point, we just incubate animals
Instead of just letting them live how they come
Yeah, but, that's your God at work, bitch!
While we go hard on Earth
What you think would happen right now if you left my place
And there were like three wolves waitin' for you?
Wolves? – Bitch, they would tear your ass up!
Viciously, like, they would eat your titties (and your pussy)
That's what they do (and your face and shit, eh)
Humans are smarter, bitch, that's what we do
She like, ”Apples to oranges”
Bitch, that phrase don't make no sense
Why can't fruit be compared?
She like, ”I'm gonna leave”
There's just all of these conflicting principles
Right, enjoy your pepperoni pizza
I will, that's my God-given right (eh)
She like, ”Where is my bag?”
Oh, that leather one next to the trash?
That's the one, right? Made out of cow, I think?
Ugh, why are there no Ubers in this area?
So you don't eat the meat (eh), you just be wearin' that shit
I'm not listenin', dude – that's barbaric as shit (eh)
Do you come from the vikings?
Why are you even still talking?
Do you take peoples' land? I'm not listenin', dude
Do you fuck with the war?
How are there no Ubers anywhere?
Just download Lyft (eh), they are bigger in presence out here
I don't wanna add shit to my phone
Okay, the choices are clear, ho
Ubers are not around here, ho
Taxis will come, but they real slow
Ayy, the Brain gotta poop
T minus five 'til the Brain gotta shit
I just downloaded Lyft, but it's being so glitchy
Uh, look, do you just want to sleep here?
Uh, no thanks – It's past 2 AM
I'm not sharing a bed with you
You can sleep in my bed, I'll sleep on the floor
Fine, you're sure? Yeah, it's cool
I won't throw you out to the wolves
Oh, my God, you are so annoying
I couldn't help myself, but can you at least throw me a pillow?

[Chorus: Lil Dicky]
I'm just pillow talkin' with a bitch, ayy
I'm just pillow talkin' with a bitch, ayy
(Do you fuck with the war?)
I just finished spazzin' on a bitch, ayy
Now I'm pillow talkin' with a bitch

[Outro: Lil Dicky, Girl & Brain]
Brain gotta poop, still
Please don't neglect the Brain
Please don't neglect the Brain
Hold on, is that my Lyft? I don't know if I—
Nah, I got a pizza – full pepperoni, too
So, you're not gonna wanna be a part of it
But first you should poop
Please don't neglect the Brain