Pastels

[Verse 1]
I dream in pastels
My sheep different colors to the background
Never fitting in, but never quite clearer
Shocked at my reflection when I look into the mirror
Lost it all in the seconds, better bet I'm still in fear of summer's last days
Trudging on throughout the winter with a sad face
I could keep all of my feelings in a glass case
I know they'll throw stones at
With hatred in their voice and off they claim they're spitting cold facts
I'm just the last to win
I burnt myself down to the dust and left the ash to wind
I call it passion but imagine after asking yourself a few hundred times if you'd be sure you could do this for life, right
Talk is cheap so these lyrics must be pennies worth
Hope it adds up to a fortune when I'm in the dirt
Dust myself up off the ground
From my endless fall
The person that I used to be just wasn't Ben at all
So now I'm pissed off
Never been awkward but I still talk
Like I don't wanna be heard
My decibel level is quite inaudible
The habit makes everybody ask me, "Who you talking to?"
I guess I'm anxious
I guess I wanna make this music but I hate it later
Safe to say I want to make it but I'm staving off the fakest parts of making art
Change my mind, and change my heart 'bout how I see these labels' cards
My bank is empty, need that green or else I'm thrifting until I make it far
So cruel regardless of whether I sell my soul
I just hope my lack of patience doesn't take control, yo

[Chorus]
I hear the birds chirping
I hear the sun rising
I watch the world going round and round without me now
I know my friends calling
Stuck in my head, falling
I'll rest my curls, peep the ceiling fan go round about