Paranoia/ why do i idolize?

Sit back while my heart still achin'
Drown in all the drugs i'm takin'
Submerged in the fear of breakin'
I'm gone nigga there's no savin'
Face down, blood pooled on pavement
I swear everybody so fake and
I don't ever wanna wake up in the A.M
Paranoia when I really start to cave in
Write this but it won't be worth it
Ruminate like "What is my purpose?"
People ask for meaning in my verses
It's a fact that these are my curses
Feel numb for the ones that hurtin'
Still bleed for the ones that hurt me
I know i'm fucked for certain
Not long for my soul to be set free
Grow old, not a thing for my idols
My mind be a friend and my rival
Will you pick up when I dial?
Leave me in pieces meanwhile
Shadows socialize in my bedroom
Voices keep speaking my language
Our love is leading me to my doom
Past thoughts coming, I can't take it

{Outro]
I can't take it