A. E. Housman
A. E. Housman
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A. E. Housman, scholars now agree, was gay, and in a time that was even less forgiving than ours. This poem is about desiring something that makes the speaker feel afraid and a little suicidal. The mischief the speaker desires could be anything. It could also be, specifically, sexual/romantic encou...
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Others, I am not the first,
Have willed more mischief than they durst:
If in the breathless night I too
Shiver now, 'tis nothing new.
More than I, if truth were told,
Have stood and sweated hot and cold,
And through their reins in ice and fire
Fear contended with desire.
Agued once like me were they,
But I like them shall win my way
Lastly to the bed of mould
Where there's neither heat nor cold.
But from my grave across my brow
Plays no wind of healing now,
And fire and ice within me fight
Beneath the suffocating night.