Only The Two Of Us Here

I camped one night in an empty hut
On the side of a lonely hill
I didn't go much on empty huts
But the night was awful chill
So I boiled me billy and had me tea
And made sure that the door was shut
Then I went to sleep in the empty bunk
By the wall of the old slab shed
Now it must have been in the middle of the night
When I was feeling cosy and warm
I woke and there at the foot of my bunk
I see a horrible ghostly form
It seemed in shape to be half an ape
With a head like a chimpanzee
And I wondered what it was doing there
And what did it want with me?
You may say if you please that I had DTs
Or call me a crimson liar
But I wish you had seen it as plain as me
With it's eyes like coals of fire
Then it gave a groan such a horrible moan
That my blood run cold with fear
And ‘There’s only the two of us here, ’
It said. ‘There’s only the two of us here!’
I kept one eye on the old hut door
And one on the awful brute;
For I only wanted to dress meself
And get to the door and scoot
But I couldn't find where I'd left me boots
So I hadn’t a chance to clear
And, ‘There’s only the two of us here, ’
It said. ‘There’s only the two of us here!’
I hadn’t a thing to defend meself
Couldn't find a stick nor a stone
And ‘There’s only the two of here!’
It said, again with a horrible moan
I thought I'd better make some reply
For I thought that the end was near
I said "Tarzan old man when I find my boots
By hell there’ll only be one of us here.’
Well I get my hands on me number tens
And out through the door I scoots
And I lit the whole of the ridges up
With the sparks from me blucher boots
So I've never slept in a hut since then
And I tremble and shake with fear
When I think of the horrible brute that moaned
‘There’s only the two of us here!’