One Too Many

[Intro]
Sometimes you just gotta talk to em, you know?
Let you know what's on my mind
And I'm running
And I'm rising

[Verse 1]
I got one too many reasons to be honest with you
I got a lot of issues
I got a lot of growth and goals that I been tryna get to
I’m rocking with you, but it’s "fuck you" if you not official
And if I drop you I’ll be wishing that I got em with you

Never been one to get caught in the lies and hooplah
Fools try rule, I’m cool, my mind too live
One too many dudes that still be acting they shoe size
One too many dude's that's worried about they crew size, ooh

One too many vices I been spending nights with
One too many times invited what I didn’t like or wife it
But the head is priceless
The kind to have a weaker nigga paying Henny prices
Or paying any prices

Ballin in college tryna get me a spot
I ain't care if you was with me or not
Cause all that time I spent with you
I always felt like I was missing my shot
And back home missing a lot

One too many times I told her I be struggling
My mental trauma got me buggin
You don’t see it’s things I’m not discussing?
You don’t recognize I’m tired of suffering?
I know I’m kinda numb it’s nothing
But my mind is traumatized from that time they got my cousin

But I gotta let her slide, tell her never stop the sucking
Ayo why am I a slave to my father’s ways?
I spend a lot of days just tryna find some time away
And that’s why I don’t got a bae

But I got one too many women in my past bitter
One too many women blame me for they last nigga
One too many ass pictures, ain’t no class pictures
One too many women down to do a dash with ya
But won’t do a task with ya

If you too eager to be riding you’ll crash quicker
One too many women looking for a cash flipper
And my only focus now is get my stash bigger
Make my stack thicker
If I crash then I won't ask niggas

All this pressure the reason I disappeared
I been working everyday but it feel like I’m missing years
I swear it been different here
Lived in fear, but I’m switching gears
And I don’t ever want you to think that I didn’t care
Cause I did

One of my homies went through something traumatic
And at the same time I kinda fell in love with the habit
Of getting low and only focusing on money and rapping
And then I run into another distraction

I hate the fact that he felt like I left him high and dry
I never would my nigga
I woulda checked in everyday, that’s if I could my nigga
I was boutta self destruct, and my mental health was fucked
Prolly selfish but, I been making sure I’m good my nigga
But we good my nigga

It’s all love
I'm grateful that you forgave me, I know it been hard cuz
Know that I’m by your side till the day that we fall cuz
It been, too many weeks that we waiting to ball cuz
We here

Dough told me he been working in insurance
I can’t even say how proud I am to witness his endurance
Leek boutta be released, they had my nigga on a leash
But he doing so much better now I think he found some peace

I at least speak to Benjie in these letters, saying he alright
But days get darker how I’m supposed to tell him see the light?
I’m free I got an easy life
He dealing with some plights that I don’t need to fight
He just need a kite

Cause it been one too many fucking Black bodies on the news
One too many people posting bout our trauma for some views
And the logic get abused, that’s why I kinda been confused
Yea they dropping outta school
And I’m still dropping them these jewels

It been one too many people say my people ain’t people
And we ain’t equal
One too many times I see the judgement coming from cathedrals Cause my oldest brother gay, and got a beautiful partner
It was the church that told that nigga he was losing the Father

So fuck these gung-ho, dumb hoe, hypocritical, pitiful
Minimal in front lobe, these wannabe pundits get punished
How could you not embrace the troubled that’s coming in bunches? And preaching wealth but all your people on government lunches

Let me not complain, cause me and them just not the same
I’m out to prove my nigga Marcus didn’t die in vain
I still run away from change I should try to claim
Which makes it one too many times I tried to hide my pain
And I still hide my pain