Non Existent Times

She sat by the fence in her petticoats gay
Waiting for her love on a summer's day
You could tell her affection by her countryman's favour
Not by the fact she’d updated on Twitter

Oh for those non-existent times
Written down in verses and rhyme
Where the maidens are bonny and the men they are bold
That kind of romance, it never grows old

A young man came courting come down from the city
With roses and lace and garmеnts so pretty
Said I’ll buy you a ring when I next gеt paid
Nowadays he’d just buy you a drink and get laid

Oh for those non-existent times
Written down in verses and rhyme
Where the men they are bonny and the maidens are bold
That kind of romance, it never grows old

She always knew she would fall for a sailor
And he would bring presents come home from the sea
My love can’t bring wages home let alone presents
Cause you can’t get a job with an English degree

Oh for those non-existent times
Written down in verses and rhyme
Where the maidens are bonny and the men they are bold
That kind of romance, it never grows old

He said to her, "Madam, in your face is beauty
You’re the prettiest maiden I ever did see"
She said to him, "Billie, you’re the boy I love best"
No one says things like that to you and me

Oh for those non-existent times
Written down in verses and rhyme
Where the men they are bonny and the maidens are bold
That kind of romance, it never grows old

I know all of the songs, I’ve sung most of them too
Sometimes I hear them when I look at you
But you don’t buy me ribbon to go in my hair
Cos nobody sells it when you go to the fair

Oh for those non-existent times
Written down in verses and rhyme
Where the maidens are bonny and the men they are bold
That kind of romance, it never grows old