New York Rapper

[Bobby Jimmy]
I'm a L.A. rapper, I went to New York
They said my rap was wack for a West Coast sort
Manhattan, Bronx, Harlem is where I went
It just won't sell, need an East Coast accent
New York rappers make some sweet hard sounds
L.A. rappers: bunch of plagiarizing clowns
New York rappers make money, you see
I even bite the style of Run DMC

[Bobby Jimmy as Run from Run DMC, purposefully mumbling]
Huh!
Unemployment at a record high
People coming, people going, people born to die
Don't ask me, because I don't know why
But it's like that, and that's the way it is

[Bobby Jimmy]
LL's records, you know they went gold
His street-smarts rhymes is what made it sold
When he wasn't saying "dis"
He wasn't saying "dat"
The man is the king of New York rap
With a "homeboy" here, rhyme some "homeboy" there
The man's gonna write a "homeboy" everywhere
Add a "illing" and a "chilling" with a little love
The man's gonna make him a million bucks
New York rappers make money that way
I even bite the rap of LL Cool J

[Bobby Jimmy as LL Cool J]
Uh!
[Spoken] Yo homeboy man, why don't you go pass me my script and I'll be a'ight!
Uh!
I don't really want to dis nobody
You think I mighta had a little too much Olde English
(Yo, homeboy, man, that's the wrong line, man!)
Oh! What the hell?
What's my DJ's name? (Emulator)
What's my DJ's name? (Emulator)
Uh!

[Bobby Jimmy]
New York rappers make a lot of noise
I even bite the rhymes of the Beastie Boys

[Bobby Jimmy as the Beastie Boys]
Chill and ill, well I got to ill and
I wanna dollar-bollar-dibbie-dobbie dollar bill!
Water pistol packing, no money having bum
Crenshaw High that's where I'm from
[?] all of the time
Sunday afternoon, I'm drinking wine
I'm down with Bobby Jimmy and it ain't no hassle
When I want a hot dog I go to White Castle

[Scratched samples from the Beastie Boys' "Hold It Now, Hit It"]
[sampled Mike D] Pump it up, homeboy!
[sampled Jimmy Castor Bunch] "Yo Leroy!"

[Bobby Jimmy]
Wait a minute, my name is Bobby Jimmy, who you calling "Leroy"?

New York rappers make money, you see
I even bite the style of Eric B

[Bobby Jimmy as Eric B. & Rakim]
The girl told me that I was crazy
I said said if I was a joint she'd probably blaze me
You see
The girl just wanted some affection
Give it to her and got an infection
Wish I had some kinds of protection
Yo dig it
I like a lot of echos on the microphone, I said [x3]
I like a lot of echos on the microphone
Yo, that'll work

[Bobby Jimmy]
New York rappers make a lot of dough
I even bite the rhymes of UTFO

[Bobby Jimmy as UTFO]
You know I got five people on the side of me
Trying to slap me on my booty
I know they're there without a doubt
Cause every once in a while they make me shout
I said, "Who is it? What can it be?
"Get with it! Au, oui, oui!"
Ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha ha ha, Lucy!
Rock and roll dude!
I'm a singer, a dancer, [?]
I can do anything anybody can do
Mixmaster, he be cutting all the time
Come on Mixmaster and bust a rhyme
Ah-oo-ah! (Mixmaster) Ah-oo-ah! (Bust a rhyme) [x2]
Yo Mixmaster, when you gonna bust a rhyme?
Ah-oo-ah!

[Bobby Jimmy]
New York rappers make money that way
Gonna bust the rhymes of Roxanne Shanté

[Bobby Jimmy as Roxanne Shanté]
What! What what what! [x2]
Why'd you have to make a record 'bout me?

[Bobby Jimmy]
Couldn't' sell my records, couldn't give 'em away
They said to take your rap home back to L.A
I left New York feeling mighty low
But I remember the immortal words of Mr. Kurtis Blow
He said, "Bobby Jimmy...

[Bobby Jimmy as Kurtis Blow]
Huh-huh huh huh
Ah-huh-huh huh huh
Ah-huh-huh huh huh
Ah-huh-huh huh huh
Ah-huh-[coughs]

[Bobby Jimmy, as a NY rap fan]
Yo homeboy, why don't you go on and bust one of them fresh New York cuts, you know?
(Oh, word up dude) (Yo man, that's def!) (Oh, word homeboy!)
Me and the B-Boys are funking it up!
Check this out, homeboy gonna scratch with his fingernail!
(Oh man, fresh, man!)
Ho! Ho! Ho!