Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer

[MUNGOJERRIE]
Mungojerrie

[RUMPELTEAZER]
And Rumpelteazer

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
We're a notorious couple of cats
As knockabout clowns, quick-change comedians
Tight-rope walkers and acrobats

[RUMPELTEAZER]
We have an extensive reputation

[MUNGOJERRIE]
We make our home in Victoria Grove

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
This is merely our centre of operation
For we are incurably given to rove

[RUMPELTEAZER]
We are very well known in Cornwall Gardens

[MUNGOJERRIE]
In Launceston Place

[RUMPELTEAZER]
And in Kensington Square

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
We have really a little more reputation
Than a couple of Cats can very well bear

[RUMPELTEAZER]
If the area window is found ajar

[MUNGOJERRIE]
And the basement looks like a field of war
If a tile or two comes loose on the roof

[RUMPELTEAZER]
Which presently fails to be waterproof

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
If the drawers are pulled out from the bedroom chests
And you can't find one of your winter vests

[RUMPELTEAZER]
If after supper one of the girls
Suddenly misses her Woolworth pearls

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
The family will say "It's that horrible cat!

[MUNGOJERRIE]
Was it Mungojerrie

[RUMPELTEAZER]
Or Rumpelteazer?"

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
And most of the time they leave it at that
Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer have a very unusual gift of the gab

[MUNGOJERRIE]
We're highly efficient cat burglars as well

[RUMPELTEAZER]
And remarkably smart at a smash and grab
We make our home in Victoria Grove

[MUNGOJERRIE]
We have no regular occupation

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
We are plausible fellows who like to engage
A friendly policeman in conversation
When the family assembles for Sunday dinner
With their minds made up that they won't get thinner

[MUNGOJERRIE]
On Argentine joint

[RUMPELTEAZER]
Potatoes and greens

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
Then the cook will appear from behind the scenes

[MUNGOJERRIE]
And say in a voice that is broken with sorrow

[RUMPELTEAZER]
"I'm afraid you must wait and have dinner tomorrow

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
For the joint has gone from the oven like that!"
The family will say "It's that horrible cat!

[MUNGOJERRIE]
Was it Mungojerrie

[RUMPELTEAZER]
Or Rumpelteazer?"

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
And most of the time they leave it at that
Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer have a wonderful way of working together

[RUMPELTEAZER]
And some of the time you would say it was luck

[MUNGOJERRIE]
And some of the time you would say it was weather

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
We'd go through the house like a hurricane

[RUMPELTEAZER]
And no sober person can take his oath

[MUNGOJERRIE]
"Was it Mungojerrie

[RUMPELTEAZER]
Or Rumpelteazer?

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
Or could you have sworn that it might have been both?"

[MUNGOJERRIE]
And when you hear a dining room smash

[RUMPELTEAZER]
Or up from the pantry there comes a loud crash

[MUNGOJERRIE]
Or down from the library there comes a loud ping

[RUMPELTEAZER]
From a vase which is commonly said to be Ming

[MUNGOJERRIE & RUMPELTEAZER]
The family would say: "Now which was which cat?
It was Mungojerrie and Rumpelteazer
And there's nothing at all to be done about that!"