Mockingbird (GAWNE Remix)

[Verse 1]
If only y'all could walk in my shoes
My life ain't what you seen on TNT or the News
It's much worse, at fifteen, I dropped out of school
With brain damage and spent my nights in hospital rooms
Became manic, drugs I used to eat up and use
I take Xanax to manage and even get through the day
Panic is eating me, been beat up and bruised, I was abused
Since a fetus, so defeated, I lose, 'til one day
It all changed, I never looked back
My older brother went away to go fight in Iraq
He left his CD collection at home, right on the rack
And I discovered Deltron 3030, Tech N9ne, Mos Def
And his Black on Both Sides album, yes, and it's facts
I knew it front-to-back, like every track
Along with Everready Nina, he could spit it so fast
I wondered one day if, "I could do that?"
So, I started writing these raps, fast forward
Tech and I now got a couple collabs, full circle, man, it's crazy
And I'm working with Shaq, I love you, Diesel, like a brother
Dawg, you gave me a chance, I won't let you down, I'll never do that
I swear to God, but it's so hard sometimes
I'm not a quitter, though, I'm lying if I said, "It never crossed my mind"
There were times when my card declined, but word to Family Guy
I got that dog in me, y'all could call me, "Brian"
From the depths of dispair, I was fighting for air
On this mic, I'm prepared to now die
I don't care, so beware, sometimes at night
I fall asleep at my chair, pen in hand
I chase a dream 'cause my life's a nightmare