Midroll

[Verse 1]
It's been a long time since i sat down with the stupid
And recapped in a track using copyrighted music
'Cause choosin' topics is hard when you're losin' your damn mind
'Cause mankind's carelessly dancin' around the landmines
Red mist, I'm a cloud of blood particles
Rainin' down, stainin' these clowns and their dumb articles
Hear 'em say out loud: "wow! he's so remarkable!"
"I'd be proud if I was endowed with such an arsenal
Of insults" induldge the cult of the impulse
To shock motherfuckers Like the gloves of Herman Schultz
Have people thank you after tearin' em up
I make a buck, you call it luck, I call it givin' no fucks
Hopefully I don't get accused of abusing people
I'm just a human perusing YouTube amusing people
And I support the left wing, I support equality
But I also like the "retard" 'cause I think that's comedy
That's there to be mined if we tried to do it properly
But the conversation's dead because I started it retardedly
Fuck, I said it twice, cancel me now
Because the things I'm sayn' ain't the most financially sound
Burn the Chris Ray Gun brand to a fat crisp
Like one whole third of a Don Mattrick hat trick
Fuck, I think I'm havin' a panic attack, quick
Bring me some nude pics of Danika. That's it!
I treasure the pressure 'cause it tethers me to the batshit
Clever as ever, got a meetin' here with a matchstick
And a Cuban cigar, I'm using the far
Reaches of the brain, and the crude and bizzare
And if I ever mind my mind, you better keep it afar
'Cause if my sanity is Aladdin, fuckin', call me Jafar
About as inconic a combo as Eustace and Marge
I'm really only good at music on acoustic guitar
So, sorry if the rhymes fall flat like an actress
Layin' her fat tits on my Perfectly Fine mattress
I seem nuts, but I'm not goin' postal, trust this!
Just 'cause I poked fun at social justice
When motherfuckers said "white peope are bad"
But don't you get that that's exactly the mindset that's had
By racists with tats on the back of their hands
Usin' pastry shorthand to bypass the scans
Lookin' at the double standard like "it ain't no thing"
When it's basically a motherfucking Halo Ring
And ain't nobody really braced for what the payload brings
But we're too busy sayin'
"Ugh! How could he say those things?!"
Fuck this! I'm out. Serenity Now!
I'm turning into a completely different entity now
I'm shatterin' peoples minds like the dreadfully loud
Gunshot, that took fuckin' Kennedy out
Go ahead burn your effigy, let the negative energy
Steadily consume you and fuck with your brain chemistry
You see me as a villain 'cause my pedigree precedes me
I kinda made a meme of MTV

[Bridge]
Okay
So if i'm to be the bad guy that people clearly want me to be
I gotta start sayin' reprehensible shit
And I guess since we've come this far and we've dug this hole this far deep down
Just keep digging right? nothing "?"

[Verse 2]
I wanna run baby Yoda over with a Toyota corolla
Put him in a coma as I sip on soda
Rinsing his little body in a stream to help him get clean
Before I ship him off to Jeffrey Epstein
To make a solid prophet, and maybe a quick buck
From a frisky prince lookin' into a quick fuck
Yonkers, to Bronx, to Poughkesspsie, bitch
I spent my whole life trudgin' in dimly lit
Corridors, a connoisseur of risky shit
Watchin' ditzy bithes meetin' with the whiskey dicks
For fifty-six bucks and some Pixie Stix
I'll rise like Quasimodo from a gypsy kiss
If you cancel me, come on, let this be quick
Do to me what the right did to the dixie chicks
"Oh shit! Did chris just take a swing at the right?"
I been swingin' dipshit, you're just to fuckin' blind
I guess in the winter all this heat is a blessin'
Still it seems like every second there's somethin' that needs addressin'
It takes a lot to hurt me, to diminish my essence
Not even clips of me undressin' used against me as a weapon
('Cause I'm kinda sorta hot)
And you might find that depressin'
You might want me dead or shot or trebuchet'd to the heavens
And now, folks, I guess we can finish this fun lesson
This is how you get a vid to ten minutes and one second