LJA [Spoken Word]

[Spoken Word]
Man, I sit down and hold tight
I feel alone, think about you every night
Devil on my back, but I try to stay right
Take him and anybody else, never scared to fight
A lost soul, the times pass, day by day
And it feels like yesterday since you passed away
I cry so many tears inside, my organs are fuckin' flooded
Drank the lean with the pills, I pop them by the dozen
But I seen that, and I knew I did you wrong
Quit the bullshit and I wrote this poem
I miss you everyday, till the day that I'm gone
Till the day you bring me home, all I feel is alone
Nobody knew me like you did, callеd you my second dad
Guess you can call me Ushеr, 'cause I got it bad
And I wasn't the type to be depressed
Tried to hold what I can and keep this shit in my chest
Put a smile on my face for the world to see
Tears of a clown, nobody knows it but me
I'd do anything, no, to have you back for one day
Give you one last hug, tell you all the words I didn't say
And even though you're there, it just ain't enough
I need you to talk back, I need to feel your touch
And I know you always told me "Stay strong and stay tough"
But you never said it would get this fuckin' rough
I never thought you'd be gone forever
And as the time passes, this shit don't get no better
Watchin' mawmaw read your love letters
Watchin' my dad miss his dad
If heaven had a taxi, shit, he'd catch that cab
Drinkin' till he numbs it up, your memory is all he has
And I know you don't like our pain
But tell me how would you feel if the only way you could see us was memory lane?
But just know this: I'ma try to do right by you
But for now, I love and miss you so much
And I hope I still make you proud too
LJA, love you