Liz Taylor’s Lipstick Gun

I HEARD THAT OPIE TAYLOR WAS LIZ TAYLOR’S SON
THEY LIVED IN MOUNT PILOT TILL THE SUMMER OF 71’
AND THEY WERE AS CLOSE AS A BURGER IS TO A BUN
I HEARD THEY WERE AS CLOSE AS A BURGER TO A BUN
AND ONE CHRISTMAS HE SPENT A MONTH IN A SHED
BUILDING A GUN THAT SHOT LIPSTICK INSTEAD OF LEAD
AND IN EVERY KINDA COLOR- BUT NEVER RED
AQUA – CANNERY – CHOCOLATE – BUT NEVER EVER RED
SHE WOULD USE IT ON SUNDAYS JUST BEFORE DUSK
WAVING HER CANON AT THE CAROLINA SUN
SHOOTING AT THE NEIGHBORS- JUST TO SEE EM RUN
AND IT MADE HER AS HAPPY AS REBEL ON THE RUN
AND IT MADE HER AS HAPPY AS A HAG ON THE HUNT
AND IT MADE HER AS HAPPY AS PIGSKIN AFTER THE PUNT
AND IT MADE HER AS HAPPY AS A PRIEST ON TOP OF A NUN
AND IT MADE HER AS HAPPY AS A PREPOSITION IN A PUN
AND IT MADE HER AS HAPPY AS LIPSTICK IN A GUN
TILL DARKNESS CAME AND EVERYONE DID RUN
HOME TO HIDE FROM LIZ AND HER LIPSTICK GUN
AND THERE NEVER WAS A HAPPIER RED HEADED SON
I HEARD THAT OPIE TAYLOR WAS LIZ TAYLOR’S SON