Life in the Fast Lane

[Intro]
(Mother screaming giving birth)
(Spoken, Male) Give me a little push. Ok
(Mother screaming fades)
(Spoken, Female) It's a boy
(Baby cries)
(Applause)
AaaaAAAAhhh Let's get ready to rumble!
Yeahhhhh!

[Verse 1]
A child is born. A new life starts
A baby, given to those who have heart
A gift from God to a woman and man
And for the first few years it's according to plan
I go to school and I make the grade
Mom and dad work hard to get paid
I'm gonna be a lawyer or sumpin close
I got a lot of potential so I'm makin' the most
My friends are real cool. We fight and makе noise
But that's how it is because boys will bе boys
But I made one friend that I should never have had
Cause after that day everything went bad
The friend I speak of is a kid named Joe
He sold drugs heavy and he clocked much dough
He had a good family just like mine
And he was a drug dealer but he came out fine
Now Joe has class and Joe has style
And although his lifestyle is somewhat wild
He has things I only hope to get
And my parents say,"Son, we can't afford that yet."
So, I see Joe
Chillin' with the women and the clothes and the dough
He is large like Trump and I'm tiny like Tim
So part of me wants to be just like him
So we eventually became friends
And he told me how I can make my ends
"Do what I do and follow my lead
And you'll clock big dollars boy yes indeed
Make a quick run to a guy named Pat
He has a heavy habit but the boy lives phat
You got nothin' to lose and everything to gain
And that began my life, ya'll, in the fast lane

[Chorus]
Life in the fast lane, c'mon

[Verse 2]
So I went into Pat's neighborhood
For five minutes work two-hundred dollars was good
My bike was old and I was truly in need
So with the money I could go and get a ten speed
I rang the bell and Pat came out
The man was a junkie. There was no doubt
There were needles everywhere and the place smelled bad
Complete with empty vials from the drugs he had
Now sellin' heroin to Pat was my duty, though
He had more tracks in his arm than a studio
So right then and there I was positive that
I would never in life turn out like Pat
Now that's when the drug addict spoke to me
And I thought that he would tell a funny joke to me
But instead he had a serious look on his face
And even though his life was a waste
He told me,"You look like a really smart young man
Get out of this drug life when you can
If you don't go now and use your head
This life will kill you and you'll wind up dead."
I ran out the house cause the vibe was spooky
And all those drugs must've made Pat kooky
Because I knew that I was good at what I did
And nobody was smarter than this kid
So Joe introduced me to a man named Pete
See I was just a runner. He was king of the streets
He gave me jobs to run so I ran
And then BOOM! I was Pete's right hand man
He took me out to dinner one night
He said,"Stick with me and I will do you right
You're a really smart kid with a hell of a brain."
Another chapter of life ya'll in the fast lane

[Chorus]
Life in the fast lane, c'mon

[Verse 3]
So I'm chillin' with Pete and everything goes well
Pat was wrong and baby I could tell
Cause money was flowin' and everything was cool
I was eighteen now so I was done with school
I graduated. The choice wasn't tough for me
Because Peter had a job lined up for me
You know a nine-to-five would've been ok
But what they make in a month I clock in a day
So now I'm an entrepreneur
Sellin' product that is rich and pure
I won't get caught cause I got too much sense
And if I do I'll get off on my first offense
I even tried crack for the first time
The stuff was crazy and it blew my mind
But havin' a problem doesn't bother me
Cause I deal the stuff so I get mine free
I move out the house. "Bye mom and dad."
They said they were happy but yo they looked so sad
Man parents are hard to figure out indeed
I thought they'd be happy to see their son succeed
But anyway I had other problems arisin'
With Peter cuttin' into my enterprisin'
I was mad as hell but I did not ill
I said,"The man hooked me up so I should just chill."
Well life in the fast lane makes you crazy
Keep on movin' and don't get lazy
And every time I felt like I wanted to quit
I pulled the pipe out and then I took a hit
Livin' this life is hard for me
Because Peter has no regard for me
Yo me and him are goin' through some strain
With problems from life, ya'll, in the fast lane

[Chorus]
Life in the fast lane, c'mon

[Verse 4]
So now, Pete smooth played me out like a gopher
His butler, maid, delivery boy and chauffeur
"Go here! Go there! Get this! Get that! Spend it!"
I thought it was time that this madness ended
I heard he got his stuff from El Salvador
And I was sick of him treating me like a labrador
So I used the money that was meant for rent
So I could front the stuff and it was money well spent
So now, the fast lane seems to be mine
Cause I'm rollin' real quick in between the lines
In a couple of weeks I was bigger than Joe
Chillin' with the women and the clothes and the dough
I ran into one of my homeboys, Herbie
Who told me news that would soon disturb me
My man stepped to me and began to speak
Sayin',"Peter got shot by the cops last week
And Joe was there and he got shot too,"
And I didn't know what the hell I'd do
If he's in the hospital I can't go see him
And if he's in jail then I can't go free him
So I smoke, but I didn't realize that
As every day went by I was more like Pat
Doin' rock after rock and I did not rest
Man I was suckin' on the pipe like a baby on a breast
So I went out so I could work my trade
With Pete and Joe gone I could really get paid
But a plain-clothes cop spotted me one day
Hopped in our cars and we were on our way
A hundred miles an hour speedin' down the block
And in the front seat was a bag full of rocks
Then a car came out and on the brakes I slammed
But not matter what I did I got hit. Damn!
I turned the key but the car won't start
And I could hear the beating of my heart
I didn't have a rabbits foot or a four leaf clover
But I had luck because the car turned over
Zoom, and I was off again
Cause I didn't want years in the federal pen
And I didn't wanna be in the morgue with a tag on my toe
That's not the way the stories gonna go
So I lost him. He could not find me
So I pulled over cause he wasn't behind me
I started smokin' rocks like a man possessed
And then I felt this pain in my chest
I tried to breathe but the air won't come
I tried to scream out and that was dumb
I couldn't do nothin'. I was frozen with pain
And that was the end of my life, ya'll, in the fast lane

[Outro]
(Skit with medical personnel talking to each other treating the narrator. The narrator describes the scene, not understanding he's having an out-of-body experience. The narrator flatlines and the medical personnel use a defibrillator to restart the heart, causing the narrator to scream in pain. The heart beat return, but slows and fades to silence.)