Last Last Fall

[Hook]
I threw my old notebooks in the trash
Don't want to turn that blue check into cash
So here comes the last hit, make it last
Make it last
Make it last
I'm tryna' figure out how you can love me
When I don't even love myself baby
But if you want to find out, then we can see
We can see
We can see

[Verse 1]

When I first met you, I hit that panic button
I know that upsets you, I wasn't capable of love
But really I was not prepared to be presentable I hated myself
And I knew that I could love you from the day you were dealt
It's like we take the perfect day off the shelf
The only thing that stop me was that knowledge itself
Talkin' bout overnight oatmeal, take you out, In-N-Out
Small pockets, big promises, and bigger self doubt
Coulda' sworn that I was too foregone for someone like you
A sworn worn with big hearts, sharp, in sepia tone
Made a promise on my mattress I'm afford to adore you
That's a ripple on my soul to difficult to ignore
Had to open up my core, as to shut doors
Standing in a quiet room young and corrupted, bug eyed and buggin'
Tuggin' strings just to hear notes, pianos, and my chest ringing out for the day that I croak, then I'll know

[Hook]
I threw my old notebooks in the trash
Don't want to turn that blue check into cash
So here comes the last hit, make it last
Make it last
Make it last
I'm tryna' figure out how you can love me
When I don't even love myself baby
But if you want to find out, then we can see
We can see
We can see

[Verse 2]
I haven't been outside the crib since Christmas, chin checking myself myself
Rubbernecking, no flexin', just remembering my daddy's a Texan
Need a break from these Best Westerns, I've been blessed with the room discretion
Looking for a therapist, very apparent I'm scared of myself
In the nation of these white terrorists, is it too late?
I need to spread the love or get tossed off this earth like a discus
Working my mental fitness, she taught me how to love myself
To begin this, but I can't pretend it's not hard to keep pretendin'
Without her don't know if these wheels will keep spinning, but new beginnings and new ends
It took awhile to be a man, but dammit if that man didn't sit me
Down and do to me what he damn well can, but I'mma sit you Down and do with us till I can stand
Because I love you and I'm ready for you
Damn

[Hook 2x]
I threw my old notebooks in the trash
Don't want to turn that blue check into cash
So here comes the last hit, make it last
Make it last
Make it last
I'm tryna' figure out how you can love me
When I don't even love myself baby
But if you want to find out, then we can see
We can see
We can see