Lamb & Eggs

From the Upcoming Stage Musical, Topper

Music by Galen H. Brown
Lyrics by Eric Zaccar

You say he’s a dull lamb or a stuffed egg
I say you’re not looking too deep
For you’ll find countless possibilities
Inside an egg or in a sheep!

Could be a white egg
A yellow egg
But rarely green;
Could be eggs benedict
Or egg foo young
Eggs Florentine!

Could be a lamb steak
A lamb bake
Or leg of lamb;
Could be a hero
A gyro
But never a ham!

Just talk about me as if I’m not here
While I stand looking pecked and henned!
Just pretend that I’m transparent and sheer!
There’s not all that much to pretend!

Could be a hard boiled
Soft boiled
Scrambled or fried;
Could be a poached egg
An omelet
Or up, sunny side!

Could be a lamb burger
Lamb balls
Sweet peppered lamb;
Could be in mustard sauce
Or yogurt sauce
Lamb glazed with jam!

Why do you hate me, I’ve done you no wrong?
But you’re just such an inane bore!
In your great fortune, I’m a vital prong!
I think that I’d rather be poor!
SPOKEN: (Right, we all believe that)!

Could be bacon and eggs
Sausage and eggs
Or eggs with cheese
It could be ham and eggs
Or spam and eggs
Eggs over ease!

Could be a lamb roast
A lamb post
Babe, that’s a stretch!
Could be a lamb stew
A lamb ragu
Who asked you, Letch?!

I’m just a nice, polite and docile man
Pillar of the banking community;
You had your fortunes placed into your hands;
Mine came come from seizing opportunity!

Could be a basted egg
A shirred egg
Or an egg bake
Could be in egg creams
Or egg nog
Eggs in your cake!

Could be a lamb shoulder
Lamb ribs
Or a lamb shank
Could be a lamb broil;
Lamb kebob;
Let’s blow this bank!

I’m just a gentle individual
Quite efficient at what I do;
My world might seem a dreary ritual;
I keep your cash growing for you!

Could be tortilla
Ranchero
Or an Egg Pie
Could be in egg salad
French toast
Or Matzah brie!

Could be a lamb chop
A lamb rump
Or a lamb belly;
Covered in duck sauce
Or soy sauce
Smothered in jelly!

Hundreds respect me here at this great bank
Employees grovel as I pass
But to you, I’m a mere marginal blank
While outside, they all kiss my ass!

Could be a deviled egg
A pickled egg
Egg on a muffin
Could be a spiced egg
A diced egg
Egg in your stuffin(g)!

Could be a lamb loin
A lamb groin
Or a lamb curry;
It’s time to lamb it
God damn it!
George, what’s your hurry?!