Keep Your Children in a Coma

Keep your children in a coma
Keep your children in a coma
Keep your children in a coma starting today

Life is hard for kids today
They have to program everything
Dude, they have to use computers just to sing!
If you keep them dosed on soma
You can spare them all that pain
Keep your children in a coma and stay sane

You can't let them go to school
For fear of bullying little beasts
And you can't take them to church for fear of priests
You can never really know, Ma
If their motives remain pure
Keep your children in a coma and be sure

All that background radiation
Oil companies run mad
Party politics amok, good girls gone...bad
They would just get melanoma
If they surfed in see-through jeans
Keep your children in a coma through their teens

Little Caleb and Paloma would be drugged up anyway
Keep your children in a coma starting today!

Keep your children in a coma
Keep your children in a coma
Keep your children in a coma starting today
Keep your children in a coma
Keep your children in a coma
Keep your children in a coma starting today