Jones Polka

Gesundheit!
Nosdrovia!
A Saluté!
Skol!
Lochaim!
Prosit!

Give-it me a cocktail
When I am blue and droopy
And then I'll dance a Polka
And make-it lots of whoopee

I work-it in a coal mine
Things are pretty black
But tonight the drinks on me
I cash-it my paycheck

Ev'rybody have a drink
Let's have fun together
I got plenty money
So catch-it double header

Bartender please take care my friends
Drinks for ladies and gents
I got all kinds money
Thirty-two dollars and forty-five cents

Have-it anything you like
Even rum and Coke-it
Just give me glass plain whiskey
Rum and Coke it make me choke-it

Fill up your glass with vishnik
We gonna have a great big picnic
Ev'rythink she's in the pink
Ev'rybody have a drink

Ev'rybody have a drink
Don't nobody start trouble
Some smart Alec like a fight
I give it trouble double

I am peaceful citizen
Don't like too drunk or make it
When I go too fast
I pull the emergency brake-it

Dat's the way I like it
Lotsa Polkas, lotsa drinking
Pretty soon you don't watch out
Ev'rybody's stinking

Bartender, why you holler
Oh, I owe you sixteen dollar
Turn on the water in the sink
Ev'rybody have a drink

(Instrumental to finish with
Gargles and other voice noises)