Ill Life

[Verse]
As the bubbles at the bottom glass sift to the top
I feel like them, wishing I could pop
They hoping I would stop, drop
I Identify with the bottom, but I recognize the top
And when you got nothing, you could recognize a lot
So you grind 'till you shine by connecting all the dots, yeah
To life's fabulous, I can't stop
They aiming for my head, still I'm riding in the drop
Like, whatever doesn't kill me gotta make me stronger
Codename Canada, my country I've conquered
And for this lonely country, I'd give anything
In return, I've gained nothing and lost everything
And now it's one thing I thought I'd never confess
So on this chessboard, I need a reality check
'Cause reality's left, so now there's nothing but stress
So in my world, we keep a hundred gunnas on deck
'Cause my brother got shot and they yellin' I'm next
And by tryna do right, shit, I almost got left
'Cause the cops say just because I refused to cooperate
I couldn't take the ambulance ride or watch 'em operate
And it coulda been the last time I see his face
To hold his hand and tell him everything will be okay
Yeah
So look where bein' real has landed me
Fake-ass friends and backstabbin' families
Fuck it
From now on, my new plans'll be
Do me without sacrificing my sanity
Please God, tell me that you got plans for me
This shit make me sicker than the cancer be
They needed help, and wasn't no one there but P
But when I called, ain't nobody answer me
I felt hurt, like ain't nobody stop to see
Left for dead, the one forgotten casualty
But they just couldn't duplicate the master key
They sketch portraits, I paint a masterpiece
Yeah, I don't wanna yell blasphemy
But grandma loses small respect she has for me
She said I'm nothing that a man should be
'Cause yo, was never in the plans for me
So I asked her: tell me what my plans should be
She said: "is this the man your little man to be?"
Started thinkin', first I lost my three OGs
And then T, look close and you'll see
You wanna end up where your friends'll be?
They took a part of me with 'em, left me amputeed
No language in the streets, we let the hammers speak
I'm 100% real like angus beef
When you're brokest (?)
No easy road, I took the harder way like Anfenny
Yeah, never thought I'd grow tired of one night
I find more happiness changin' my son's diapers
Proud when I seen him crawlin' up the steps
With a little King Junior chain weighin' down his neck
And me and my pops just started to talk again
My son just turned three, he hasn't met him yet
He never asked, nah, so I don't reply
Women ask I got a kid, I don't deny
I won't deny to these women, I told a few tales
But that lie is one line I'm not prepared to tell
Never seen my aunt in years and it's killin' me
She finally comin' home after doin' 17
I can't imagine what she's seen in there
She 'bout the money, so I'm hopin' it's a greener year
Yeah, I'm from the city of cleaner air
Let's congratulate all the haters for still bein' here

[Hook]
I live a ill life
They know I live a ill life
It go
On my son, I live a ill life
On my mom, I live a ill life
On my pop, I live a ill life
And they know I live a ill life