If You Are Here You Are Blessed

Hey, uh, it is Monday, March 28th, 2022
I am not sure why I'm recording this, frankly
Um, I'm not–I don't have anything planned to say, but
I made the walk to the spot behind the quarry
Um, if you know what I mean
Um, because, uh, last night and this morning have been kind of rough for me
In a weird, vague, floaty way, um
I don't know, I've been listening to a lot of fuckin' sad music
A lot of uh, Flowers of Robert Mapplethorpe, a few Vylet Pony songs, um
And you know I just
I know this, I know this, I've known this
But there's just this weird fucking– interplay between like two very–
Hurt parts of me
The part that, you know, really cares for people, and doesn't want to hurt anybody, wants to make sure everyone's happy
And then the part of me that needs so fucking desperately to be held, to be told that it's going to be okay
Because–
I have a hard time doing that for myself
I try my best, but it doesn't always come across, and- um
And so yeah, you know, I–I wanna spend time with people