If It Has to Be Christmas (American Version)

It's Christmas
A time of joy and generosity
The season of good deeds and charity
We're inspired by the love and warmth we see

It's easy as one, two, three
When it's Christmas
You send a heartfelt smile to someone strange
You give someone in need a little change
Oh, it's almost like rehearsed and prearranged
And I gotta say

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're an asshole
If you think the season is the reason
You're a piece of shit
If someone has to dress up like Santa or you won't back a fund raise
Then you're a low-life fucking dick

It's Christmas
You spare a little change and make believe
Your conscience will be clear on Christmas Eve
Then you entertain yourself with gluttony
And shopping sprees

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're a son of a bitch
If you think compassion's just in fashion
You're a fucking douche
If it has to be New Year's for you to make a change for the better
You're a spineless fucking turd

Oh, you're so pleased with yourself
Fighting the good fight, one month out of twelve

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're an asshole (You're an asshole)
If you think the season is the reason
You're a piece of shit
If someone has to dress up like Santa or you won't back a fund raise
Then you're a fuck face (You're a fuck face)

If it has to be Christmas for you to be nice
You're a son of a bitch
If you think compassion's just in fashion
You're a fucking douche
If it has to be New Year's for you to make a change for the better
Then you're a spineless fucking turd

You're a spineless fucking turd

Make that fucking change