I’ve Seen Pain

[Intro]
So far this year, this city has seen 115 homicides, and the number of people shot but survived 375. What's scary is it's not even summer yet

[Big Hoodoo]
Man I'm telling ya

[Verse 1: Big Hoodoo]
Homies murdered in front of me on the streets
I done seen it all
His mama don't even know yet, now tell me, who gon' make the call?
I've been to twenty-seven funerals already this year
Ain't no kids outside playing
Everyone's living in fear
So when the police just as reckless, I wonder who is gon' protect us from the murderers, petty thieves, rapists, and child molesters
It's so ill, times are depressing
Making it hard to count my blessings
I feel like I'm being tested and I'm destined to fail
They'll either put me six feet under or they'll take me to jail
Not knowing which way I should turn I looked to God for the answer
He ain't respond
A few months later my grandaddy died of cancer
I was right there with him, when he left
I saw his spirit fly away
I dropped my tears off on his chest and watched his eyes turn grey
What can I say, my life is darker than 12:01 a.m
I drown my sorrows deep within with this half-gallon of gin
Feel like the walls are closing in in this hard life of sin

[Chorus: Big Hoodoo]
I've seen pain
Do you believe?
I know you believe in my life
Through my eyes, I've seen pain
Everything I had, everything I was, I lost it
Can't feel nothing
But this suffering, I've seen pain
You couldn't stand one second in my shoes
You couldn't walk a block in my life
In my life
Through these hard times, I've seen pain
I know you feel it deep inside
Dread my pain, drench your soul
Can't keep my head held high when I feel dead inside
I've seen pain

[Verse 2: Big Hoodoo]
We try and walk the path of the righteous
But when yo baby crying cause she starving then we might just resort to robbing anyone out here ain't living like us
They got us fucked up
And poverty is like a virus
And niggas plot behind your back while we can't trust one another
We all trapped in here together, we should look out for each other
Preach
My sisters baby daddy choked her to death while they was fighting
I wish I could've been there to help her, but I probably wouldn't be here writing
So many people I don' lost over nothing
I'm deeply suffering from anxieties of losing some more
My grip is slipping on reality, I'm losing control
And I just wanna hurt somebody for the pain that I feel
Not sure how long I can retrain it, only time will reveal
I'll play the cards that I was dealt, but I got fucked on the deal
It's every man for theyself, so now it's cutthroat for real
I put it all up in this song
So you can see how I feel

[Chorus: Big Hoodoo]
I've seen pain
Listen up
They don't give a fuck about me
They don't give a fuck about you
In my life
Through my eyes I've seen pain
They don't know hard times
They don't know struggle
They don't know what's in my heart
Can't feel nothing but this suffering
I've seen pain
Having this like a sickness nigga
And I'm still in the game to get my [ancients?] too
In my life, through these hard time I've seen pain
You don't know what I've been through
You don't see my pain
Can't keep my head held high when I feel dead inside
I've seen pain

[Verse 3: Big Hoodoo]
Trying so hard to heal this hurting
But ain't nothing really working
Wicked thoughts are heavy lurking
Grandma say I need some churching
The rent is overdue, ain't got a buck to my name
It's a shame, now who's to blame if you get fucked in the game?
I must be touched in the brain
I'll put that up as a disclaimer
Baby momma keep the kids away and I can't really blame her
Miss my life long friends cause we ain't talking like we used to
They had love for the Dubbla but they ain't gon' none for Hoodoo