I Swear That I’m Trying

Fuck this shit
I just wanna kill myself
I dont feel like i'm alive
And i don’t care about my health
Everything you said
Stuck inside my head
Makes me think i'll be okay
One day
But i know thats not the truth
I know i'll be this way forever
And i do not care
I don’t care
As long as you are here
I'll keep on trying
I swear that i'm trying now

Isolate myself
Then wonder why i hate myself
Why can't i be happy
I don't feel like this is working out
But i can't be happy
No, my brain doesn't work like that
I'll just kill the pain with smoke
I hate myself
I’m such a mess
What’s the point of even trying
Spend most of these late nights crying
Say i'm okay
But i’m lying
I don't think you understand me
My whole life just feels so empty
You don't know a thing about me
Say i should be happy
I wish i could
But i'm stuck
I swear she’ll hate me in the end

Fuck this shit
I just wanna kill myself
I dont feel like i'm alive
And i don't care about my health
Everything you said
Stuck inside my head
Makes me think i'll be okay
One day
But i know thats not the truth
I know i'll be this way forever
And i do not care
I don't care
As long as you are here
I'll keep on trying
I swear that i'm trying now