I Married a Mouse of a Man

Listen, girls, listen to a woman who’s blue
Listen and wish that it’ll never be you
Oh, it’s been a man’s world ever since time began
But I think men are shrinking, I’ll explain if I can

I married a mouse of a man
He’s peppy as a whiskered old clam
An anemic mosquito has more love than him
And the way that he bragged once, why it’s a darn sin

I love to be fondled by a man, good and tight
But girls it’s a travail when it’s all in the mind
I married a mouse of a man
What a heck of fix to be in

I married a mouse of a man
Evidently, he’s just second hand
Never marry a shrimp lest he’s bout 6 feet tall
A life of just wishin’ has no kick at all

What good are the strawberries without any cream?
What good is a river if it’s just a dry stream?
I married a mouse of a man
What a heck of a fix to be in

I married a mouse of a man
How I suffered, girls, you’ll understand
And to think how I wasted my sweet youthful years
With a rat who’s not worth the sweet salt of my tears

Oh, girls take my warning if you ever do wed
Don’t marry a weakling; you’ll be better off dead
I married a mouse of a man
What a heck of a fix to be in