I’m the best at ruining my life

[Verse 1]
I wish I could look at your eyes again
I even wish that we could be just friends
I want you to be here with me
There are things I wish I could have said
But words just didn't come out
In the moment that I wish they did
I had a dream about you last night
It was the first one that you were in

[Chorus]
Control is something I lose all the time
I can't even fall asleep at night
I know that I'm ruining my life
I'm the best at ruining my life

Control is something I lose all the time
I can't even fall asleep at night
I know that I'm ruining my life

[Verse 2]
And I wanna feel your touch
And I wanna feel your skin
And I wanna hold you close
But that's a game I cannot win
It's hard to see you walk away
Didn't get to hear your voice
Until I see you again
I won't know if I'm right or wrong

The moments that I can remember
They were short but still feel special
This path that I walk is lesser
I know that I could be better

Hiding
I swear, my worlds divided
Where the pills at? I can't find them
I just realized I'm surrounded
Burns like fire but it's darkness

[Chorus]
Control is something I lose all the time
I can't even fall asleep at night
I know that I'm ruining my life
I'm the best at ruining my life

Control is something I lose all the time
I can't even fall asleep at night
I know that I'm ruining my life

[Outro]
When you were right there
Colors looked so vibrant
I was silent but inside I was smiling
All the time spent, walking without guidance
I'm still trying
Why am I still trying?