I dont wanna grow up

When I was young I’d play all day
Now I’m inside that’s all I can say
The rain on the window is loud
The music on the speaker is sad
I just wanna make someone proud
But I can’t since I was crowned
I try and make a fucking sound
But all the voices in my head are bound
To my body and my soul
My heart has a hole
What was my original goal
Was it to make it big or make myself sane
I probably sound really vain
I’m rapping verses about pain
But the next song is upbeat so inconsistent
I just wanna be persistent
All these haters are really insistent
That I’m never gonna make it
But when they look back they take it
With them
I’m on an 11 in sadness out of ten
I just wanna go back and start again
I’m waiting death to come to my door
And I’ll answer and say who’s this for
But it won’t be my time yet leave me be
I’m trying to spread truth can’t you see
I can’t die yet until I’m finally free
I slam the door shut and open my eyes

I wake up in a home full of lies
Gotta watch my back around my family
Have a look at what they do to me
They’re trying to still get through to me
But I release my thoughts through Spotify
So people can see my pain and go so am I
Put my lyrics on sad posts but no context
Like they choose my songs to forget
That it’s about opening up to others
It’s about getting through pain of lovers
This isn’t a love song it’s a show love
I see my songs and I say is it enough
Making songs through pain is tough
But someone has to do it so I will
It doesn’t matter about the bill
So you can understand what I say
And so what if you have money to pay
I’ll take it for my hard work that’s it
I won’t waste all of it on random shit

I waste all my money on cigarettes
But I honestly have no regrets
I don’t wanna grow up but I need to
I don’t wanna blow up but I need to
Growing up is a dilemma I made
Don’t worry it’s ok to be afraid
I don’t wanna grow up but I need to
I don’t wanna blow up but I need to

Don’t waste time on the haters
Make them all see you laters
To be honest they’re all fakers
Anyone wanna do it we got any takers
Don’t let any money Change us
Don’t let anyone degrade us
These teachers will say they made us
But it’s us who grows and gets better
Sit down and burn your suicide letter
We all get sad but no time for death
We haven’t got time to be upset
We haven’t got time to have a regret
Don’t waste money on alcohol and drugs
Go out buy a dog buy some pugs
Make your life more fun
Put down the gun
I’d say that’s it but I’m not done
I just wanna save the depression
I live a world full of obsession
Over sad music get some uplifting
I feel like these lyrics are more fitting
I’ll still make sad songs so you can relate
But listen to this song while you wait
Because sad song making is my trait
But to be honest it’s all just bait
I may get depressed but I see the good
I just always seem to get in a bad mood
I’m sorry to allude
To a bad situation but now I’m great
Don’t let anyone put you down
Make sure you’re wearing a faded crown
But whenever you are down
Stick your finger up at the world
And hold it there for them all to see
And shout “IM FUCKING ME”

I waste all my money on cigarettes
But I honestly have no regrets
I don’t wanna grow up but I need to
I don’t wanna blow up but I need to
Growing up is a dilemma I made
Don’t worry it’s ok to be afraid
I don’t wanna grow up but I need to
I don’t wanna blow up but I need to

I waste all my money on cigarettes
But I honestly have no regrets
I don’t wanna grow up but I need to
I don’t wanna blow up but I need to
Growing up is a dilemma I made
Don’t worry it’s ok to be afraid
I don’t wanna grow up but I need to
I don’t wanna blow up but I need to