I Am Not Warm

I am not warm
I am not cheek to cheek
I am not the person you want me to be
I was thinking about that this morning
While I watched you sleep
While I rubbed your back
And reminded you to breathe

I’m sorry I’m prone to recoil
A kiss on my neck feels like a spider’s web
I need to be alone

But I always return
After I breath and lay my head
And rest my eyes