Huffys Between Dumpsters

Guy: Slipknot? Yeah! Uh, I did all of Metallica. I was a drummer in Metallica, uh on the first three cuts. Uh, fucking, uh, high-rythm something-something Axl of Guns 'n' Roses. Uh Creed, I do Creed. Uh, Nine Inch Nails… Marilyn Manson… uh… who else can I do? Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, uh… Red Hot Chili Peppers.

Band Member: You were in the bands?

Guy: No, I'm the one that's doin' all the songwritin'. I wrote all the songs for all of those.

Band Member: Really?!

Guy: Yeah! I'm the songwriter, I'm the producer! I produced some of 'em, uh, uh in Dallas there at the studio there. I can't, it's on uh, if you know which state fair is it's like station number seven, I think? Outta here, outta there it's right next to the state fair in Texas. East Grand and uh, Grand and, some other fuckin' street there. I can't remember, but that's, but that's where they shot me at was outside the radio station. Yeah I was Howard Stern on there, man. I'm the one who started Howard.

Band Member: Wow, man, you got a lotta shit.

Guy: Yeah. I worked for Walt Disney as well, man. I'm tryna, I don't think it'll take me a little while to get back in the swing of things, know'm'sayin?

Band Member: Yeah, what songs did you write for Metallica?

Guy: All of-the whole damn CD's, all of 'em. From start, start to finish.

Band Member: You wrote all of it?

Guy: All of it. From start to finish.

Band Member: Wow!

Guy: Megadeth I drummed-when we did the recordings out there, I was the drummer and uh, let's see. I was the lead singer of Guns 'n' Roses. All of Guns 'n' Roses is my voice on there. I cut that in the studio. Uh, Red Hot Chili Peppers was uh, I wrote and sent somewhere else, and, and they produced it. Uhm, Nine Inch Nails, Marilyn Manson, uhhhh Creed… uh… Third Eye Blind, uh… who else was there? I did like 20 different hills, man. I think I ended up with like 15 new bands. Uh, and then, I did uh… six country, maybe seven country.

Band Member: That's amazing! Yuh.

Guy: It's been a lot, man. You look familiar! I was like, "Man wait… I think I've seen this dude somewhere. I probably talked to you somewhere." Bein' that I was with my homeboy, Mike, but uhm, I didn't see him in a long time, but uh, yeah, I'm back in town, man! Just tryna get a paycheck. And uhm, hell, it's been a while, man. Ya'll doin' any hirin' over there?

Band Member: Not right now.

Guy: No?

Band Member: "No."

Guy: You know anybody lookin' for songwriters and stuff?

Band Member: No.

Guy: 'Cause I still have some uh, if I can remember where they are, I think they're in weggy back home in Texas and in the vault is some uncut stuff, y'know? Just like it's already on CD's.

Band Member: Mhm.

Guy: All it's gotta do is be produced, y'know'm'sayin?

Band Member: Yeah. Yeah

Guy: Yeah I got probably a hundred of 'em in uh… and I write, when I write I write extra's… but all I put out was about six CD's, maybe seven.

Band Member: Right.

Guy: To me that's it. Y'know?

Band Member: Yeah.

Guy: That's 10-year deal. That's a career in 10 years. Haha.

Band Member: Yeah, exactly!

Guy: Six CD's, y'know? I'm Bob Seger. My son's Bob Seger!

Band Member: Really!?

Guy: Yeah! When I wrote all the Bob Seger's, I hired this other Guy that's like a Portugal Guy. Well, I fired him after the first two CD's Bob came out with. I paid him uhm… I paid him three million for two CD's. He's fucking good, man! But he make a lot for sure he was a child molester, man and I just… y'know, man I said, "Hey, dude. You gotta go, man." So I hired my son. My son works at Thailand's in Texas. And uh, he finished off those last five CD's of Bob Seger.

Band Member: Cool, man. Good luck to you, man.

Guy: Yeah. I'll be back. Cool. I gotta go get me some rehabilitation and some new lessons.

Band Member: Yup.

Guy: I used to work over there, man! That's my shop-my old shop! Down on Hollywood Vine right there.

Band Member: Yeah.

Guy: You walk in there, and that first little creature down on the bottom, that's me back in the seventies, dude! Bad Company! Started out with Bad Company up in Detroit. Came down here, and joined two other bands. I played just in studio on rhythm.

Band Member: Wow!

Guy: Yeah. Bad trouble on Bad Company, man. Fuckin' cocaine habit. Fuckin'… hahaha

Band Member: Yeah. That'll do it. That'll do it.

Guy: You know what I mean, right? You get out on the road out there, and you're in that bus man, your shit.

Band Member: Yeah

Guy: You're lockin' it down, man.

Band Member: So you were in Bad Company?

Guy: Yeah!

Band Member: What'd you play for 'em?

Guy: Rhythm.

Band Member: Guitar?

Guy: Yeah. I play rhythm like a motherfucker, dude. I was uh, I just was recertified in '85, let's see, maybe it was '85, for rhythm, for number seven all-time rhythm guitar player-Slash! Hahaha.

Band Member: "Yeeeahh."

Guy: "Yeah that was my name back then with Bob Seger. Um, Homer Deck, he used to play too! He's from Germany, but he's all fucked up now, too. I knew him back when we were ridin' bikes. I used to ride bikes, man. Got in trouble… hahaha

Band Member: Yeah.

Guy: 15 years of San Quintin! Hahah!

Band Member: Ohh.

Guy: Eight years of Vito!

Band Member: Hahaha

Guy: I got to Texas in eight years down there, man.