How To Get Money

Heh heh heh...

Believe it or not
There are some people out there who still don't use guns
Now they're struggling
They could use some new shoes, the rent's due
But they still don't shoot 'em
Heh heh heh...
Cutting corners, counting coupons
But here's the practical solutions
Y'all to get your extra loot from

(bang baby, bang)
This is how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
Tell me how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody

Some people got a heart of gold
You don't get shit when you pawn that though
Stocks drop, economic slopes
Put me on the road in amish clothes
I'll sell ceramic bowls and artichokes

Panhandlin' in a army coat
Doing astrological readings at the carnival
Tell models I'm from cosmo
Air guitar to rock and roll
Selling guys on Harleys fake rocks to smoke
And the fake parking spot in the no parking zone
Heh heh...

Man
I got fake passes to games that ain't happening
Take napkins, salt shakers, placemats
When I leave a place I never ate at, man
Need a ride? Throw on the valet jacket and take a spin
You get a good enough tip, maybe drop it off on your way back in

Some girl on the radio singing "who'll save my soul"
I don't know, but I can save some dough
Taking the occasional toilet paper roll from every place I go

(bang baby, bang)
This is how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
Tell me how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
How to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
Tell me how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody

Well I've been robbed a few times
So I can give you some pointers
We ain't talkin' about stealing change
From your grandma's coin purse
Get the toy first, from the truck before it hits the toy store
Make the deals, cut out the employer
You wanna poison my drink?
You have to buy me two
Plus some poison slice of pizza and some poison Chinese food

Need a credit card?
We hit the I.C.U
Find a few who besides their short, dying in the '92
The I.D. might be you
And if that don't work sell the I.V. fluid

Now old apartment basements got copper piping
Use the proper lighting, or all you get is cops and sirens
When you smash the water lines in
Need a sugar momma to support you?
Hang around courtrooms, divorce support groups
Outside the reportorial sport coop with the convertible roof

This is how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
Tell me how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
How to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody
Tell me how to get (money)
And not have to shoot somebody

You've been working a lot?
Get hurt on the job
Girls, wear a skirt
Tie your shirt in a knot
Firt with your boss, far off from burning your bras
You got value now you work what you got
Heh heh heh heh heh...

Yes, tune in later for debates on escaping from cop cars
Equations on chalk boards, for fakin' out doctors and making your heart stop
Until then, you can catch out at the golf course
Drunk, racing the golf carts

Heh heh heh heh heh...
Yeah, (bang baby, bang)