Hitched

Since you walked out on me I get calls from pretty women every day
Since you walked out on me I get calls from pretty women every day
But this ring on my fingers, hell, I guess it means that I can't play

This chick's been calling me
Says she' d be happy as can be
If I just would
Seems you're a thousand miles away
And I don't see why I can't say
That I could
If I refuse her gracefully
She' s still gonna think of me
L'm awful rude...

[Chorus]
You got me...
Hitched!
Hitched!
And you're prematurely seven-year-itched
Hitched!
Hitched!
Wammy' d, voodoo' d, mojo' d and bewitched!

When I was young and single them pretty ladies never looked at me
No, when I was young and single them ladies never took a chance with me
And now they're all around me, when l'm married getting' fat and thirty-three!

You walked out of our house
You said you don't know
If you're ever comin' back
Said I should get on with my life
Get my head down
And stick to my tracks
But these chicks are all around me
And it's lookin' like
My will is gonna crack!

[Chorus]
It's getting' hard to take
'Cause she's standin' close
And breathin' in my ear
I pretend I haven't noticed
Light a cigarette
And sip here on my beer
It's just the fact that I don't smoke
Makes her point out
That I'm actin' kinda queer!