Ren wrote in the comments of this song’s release video, “Up until I was 9 years old, I would intermittently hear a voice in my head that was not my own. The voice was distinctly different to mine, and always negative. It would self criticise or urge me to do things I knew to be morally wrong. The mo...
[Instrumental]
[Intro]
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Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooooh
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[Verse 1]
Hi there, Ren, it's been a little while, did you miss me?
You thought you’d buried me, didn't you? Risky
'Cause I always come back, deep down you know that
Deep down you know I'm always in periphery
Ren, aren't you pleased to see me?
It's been weeks since we spoke, bro, I know you need me
You’re the sheep, I'm the shepherd, not your place to lead me
Not your place to be biting off the hand that feeds me
[Verse 2]
Hi Ren, I’ve been taking some time to be distant, I’ve been taking some time to be still
I'vе been taking some time to be by mysеlf since my therapist told me I'm ill
And I've been making some progress lately, and I've learnt some new coping skills
So I haven't really needed you much, man, I think we need to just step back and chill
[Verse 3]
Ren, you sound more insane than I do
You think that those doctors are really there to guide you?
Been through this a million times, your civilian mind is so perfect at always being lied to
Okay, take another pill, boy, drown yourself in the sound of white noise
Follow this ten-step program, rejoice!
All your problems will be gone! Fucking dumb boy
[Verse 4]
Nah, mate, this time it's different man, trust me, I feel like things might be falling in place
And my music's been kinda doing bits too, like I actually might do something great
And when I'm gone, maybe I'll be remembered, for doing something special with myself
That's why I don't think that we should talk, man, 'cause when you're with me, it never seems to help
[Verse 5]
You think that you can amputate me?
I am you, you are me, you are I, I am we
We are one, split in two, that makes one, so you see:
You got to kill you if you wanna kill me
I'm not leftover dinner, I’m not scraps on the side
Oh, your music is thriving? Delusional guy!
Where's your top ten hit? Where's your interview with Oprah?
Where are your Grammy's Ren? Nowhere!
[Verse 6]
Yeah, but, my music's not commercial like that
I never chased numbers, statistics or stats
I never write hooks for the radio, they never even play me, so why would I concern myself with that?
But my music is really connecting
And the people who find it respect it
And for me, that's enough, 'cause this life's been tough so it gives me a purpose I can rest in
[Verse 7]
Man, you sound so pretentious!
Ren, your music is so self-centered
No one wants to hear another song about how much you hate yourself, trust me
You should be so lucky, having me inside you to guide you
Remind you
To manage expectations, provide you
Perspective, that thing you neglected, I get it
You wanna be a big deal, next Jimi Hendrix? Forget it
(Man, it's not like that)
Man, it's just like that, I'm inside you, you twat!
(No, it's not, man you're wrong, when I write I belong)
Let me break the fourth wall by acknowledging this song:
Ren sits down, has a stroke of genius
He wants to write a song that was not done previous
A battle with his subconscious, Eminem did it
(Played on guitar?) Plan B did it!
Man you're not original, you criminal rip-off artist, the pinnacle of your success is stealing other people's material
Ren, mate, we've heard it all before
Oh, "She sells seashells on the sea shore"
[Verse 8]
Fuck you! I don't need you, I don't need to hear this
'Cause I'm fine by myself, I'm a genius!
And I will be great, and I will make waves
And I'll shake up the whole world beneath us
[Verse 9]
That's right, speak your truth!
Your fucking god complex leaks out of you
It's refreshing to actually hear you say it instead of downplay it
“Ugh, music is all about the creative process
And if people can find something to relate to within that, then that's just a bonus”
[Verse 10]
Fuck you! I'ma fucking kill you, Ren
(Well, fucking kill me, then! Let's fucking have you, Ren)
I'mma do it, watch me prove it, who are you to doubt my music?
‘Cause I call the shots, I choose if you die
Yeah, I call the shots and so I choose who survives
I'll tie you up in knots when I lock you inside
[Bridge]
News flash
I was created at the dawn of creation, I am temptation
I am the snake in Eden, I am the reason for treason
Beheading all kings, I am sin, with no rhyme or reason
Sun of the morning, Lucifer, Antichrist
Father of lies, Mestophales
Truth in a blender, deceitful pretender
The banished avenger, the righteous surrender
When standing in front of my solar eclipse
My name, it is stitched to your lips, so you see
I won't bow to the will of a mortal, feeble, and normal
You wanna kill me? I'm eternal, immortal
I live in every decision that catalysed chaos, that causes division
I live inside death, the beginning of ends
I am you, you are me, I am you, Ren!
[Verse 11]
Hi Ren, I’ve been taking some time to be distant, I’ve been taking some time to be still
I’ve been taking some time to be by myself and I've spent half my life ill
But just as sure as the tide starts turning, just as sure as the night has dawn
Just as sure as the rainfall soon runs dry when you stand in an eye of a storm
I was made to be tested and twisted, I was made to be broken and beat
I was made by His hand, it's all part of His plan that I stand on my own two feet
And you know me, my will is eternal, and you know me, you've met me before
Face to face with a beast, I will rise from the east, and I'll settle on the ocean floor
And I go by many names also, some people know me as hope
Some people know me as the voice that you hear when you loosen the noose on the rope
And you know how I know that I'll prosper? 'Cause I stand here beside you today
I have stood in the flames that cremated my brain and I didn't once flinch or shake
So cower at the man I've become when I sing from the top of my lungs
That I won't retire, I'll stand in your fire, inspire the meek to be strong
And when I am gone, I will rise in the music that I left behind
Ferocious, persistent, immortal like you, we’re a coin with two different sides
[Outro]
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Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooooh
Ooooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooooh
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[Spoken Outro]
When I was seventeen years old, I shouted out into an empty room, into a blank canvas that I would defeat the forces of evil
And for the next ten years of my life I suffered the consequences...
With autoimmunity illness, and psychosis
As I got older, I realized there were no real winners and there were no real losers in psychological warfare
But there were victims and there were students
It wasn’t David versus Goliath, it was a pendulum
Eternally swaying from the dark to the light
And the more intensely that the light shone, the darker the shadow it casts
It was never really a battle for me to win, it was an eternal dance
And like a dance, the more rigid I became, the harder it got
The more I cursed my clumsy footsteps, the more I struggled
So I got older
And I learned to relax, and I learned to soften, and that dance got easier
It is this eternal dance that separates human beings from angels, from demons, from gods
And I must not forget, we must not forget, that we are human beings