Here Come the Choppers

Up there over Wilshire the whirly-birds zoom
Above the El Rey, circling the Conga Room
They turn on the lights, pull out the stoppers
Get off the streets now, here come the choppers

Here come the choppers, just when we thought
We were safe in our houses and we couldn’t get caught
The choppers are back, they were gone for a while
But now we’re under attack in the Miracle Mile

We’re together alone and there’s nowhere to go
We live in a war zone on Museum Row
No, this is no game of robbers and coppers
Hide under your lemon trees, here come the choppers

Read us our rights, we’re the criminal faction
Hit by the lights and caught in the action
Our entire performance is captured on tape
Knocking over our garbage as we try to escape

They’re strafing Ralph’s, attention shoppers
Get out of the store now, here come the choppers
Don’t bother with paper, take a black plastic bag
They’re buzzing Koo-Koo-Roo Chicken, hovering over SAG

Just when you hope that they might call it quits
The choppers turn toward the La Brea Tar Pits
One saber-tooth sculpture snarls at the sky
The mammoth made of stone seems ready to die

So many sorties, look out below
Staples, Blockbuster, and Office Depot
Their sights set on Sav-On, surveying Rite-Aid
At Mo’ Better Meaty Meat Burgers, be very afraid

North to the Grove, West to Fairfax
At Dupar’s duck and cover, here come the attacks
The inspectors found nothing – that’s just not right –
Whole Foods and K-Mart are targets tonight

The Meridian Health Club has hidden machines
Of torture, it will be blown to smithereens
Some will maimed, some will be killed
One smart bomb takes out the whole Writer’s Guild

The tramp camped on Curson lives in his dream
From his Ralph’s shopping cart he heads his regime
But his days are numbered, for in a short while
His ouster takes place from the Miracle Mile

Now it’s getting quiet, do you feel the calm?
Remember those movies they made about ‘Nam?
Could this be the end, this latest attack?
I hear the choppers now, they’re coming back