I met a girl last night that I wanted to love
Let me tell you man what a fool I was
I took her home like she was twenty one
And when I met her mother she said "I'm sorry son"
I said "Ho ho ho ho, please let me explain"
She said "When you see the judge, you can tell him everything"
The girl looked at her mother, she said "Mother let him go
It's all my fault, mama, 'cause he didn't know"
Her mother looked around, she said "He's sure a fool
This man now is ten times seven and he knows the rules"
I said "Ho ho ho ho, please let me explain"
She said "When you see the judge, you can tell him everything"
Then her mother said "Jo, you better come here quick
I've a rascal outside and he thinks he's slick"
I stand to make up, had a mind to run
And out stepped Jo with his Tommy gun
I said "Ho ho ho ho, please let me explain"
She said "When you see the judge, you can tell him everything"
I said "Please, please mister, I didn't think no wrong"
He said "I make sure you leave my daughter alone"
He said "Now you don't have to worry about judge Hume
'Cause it was me and my job and you had your fuel"
I said "Ho ho ho ho, please let me explain"
He said "I'm the judge and you're talking to the jury man"
He Knows the Rules was written by Jimmy McCracklin.
He Knows the Rules was produced by Neil Slaven.