Handjobs for Jesus

[Verse 1]
I don't know what ends
I don't know what makes me feel alive
'Cause all this time, I've been alone
The bible says it all
But when they wrote that book, the Earth was flat
They needed hope, they needed faith

[Chorus]
I've spent all this time analyzing
All this time scrutinizing
All this time hypothisizing
All this time philosophizing
Is this life random and meaningless?

[Verse 2]
They saw a burning bush
If I would starve myself for ninenty days
Well, I'd have visions of my own
Love your neighbor as yourself
If I loved myself last night, does that mean
I need to jerk my neighbor off as well?

[Chorus]
I've spent all this time analyzing
All this time scrutinizing
(But what's it worth?!)
All this time hypothisizing
All this time philosophizing
Is this life random and meaningless?

[Bridge]
Do I make this trouble?
Do I make this complicated?
Indeed, this is an answer for everyone
What if I never heard of Jesus?
What if I was born alone in a cell?
You would burn and burn in...
Heaven will wait, heaven's too late
I choose to find my heaven here on Earth
So all religion can go straight...
Straight to hell!

[Guitar Solo]

[Breakdown]
God has spoken
God will smoke all the Earth
God has spoken
God will smoke all the Earth

[Guitar Solo]

[Breakdown]
God has spoken
God has spoken
(God has spoken)
(God has spoken)
Spoken!
Spoken!
Spoken!
Spoken!

[Verse 3]
(Whoo!) Walking down life's highway
I finally found my soulmate in Jesus
Yeah, in Jesus
He's a friend when I had none
Handjobs for the homeless with Jesus
Yeah, with Jesus (Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!)

[Chorus]
Come on, come on, come on
Come on, come on, come on
Handjobs for Jesus
Handjobs for Jesus
(Handjobs for Jesus)
Come on, come on, come on
(Come on, come on)
Come on, come on, come on
Handjobs for Jesus
Handjobs for Jesus
Handjobs for Jesus! Jesus! Jesus!

[Outro]
Christ, because he changed my heart