Gumby Jaws Lament

("Weird" Al Yankovic - accordion)
I've never really understood why my family hated me
But I know they did
All of them
Right from the start

I never had many friends of my own-- We moved a lot. We had to
My mother was mentally ill, and she would start fires in nurseries, so we had to move a lot

I never graduated from school, I just stopped going after the seventh grade
I remember not being able to do enough pushups, And this fat homosexual gym coach kept pushing me on the back of my neck
That's when I first realized that I didn't want to become another old fat homosexual gym coach. Life is like that

I watched a lot of television, mostly the game shows. I could tell you the cost of about anything between 1966 and 1969, but that and a nickel won't get me on a bus
I love buses. I really like the smell, don't you? I could live in the middle of a crowded bus

If someone asked you for a quarter, so that they could play a song on the jukebox, and you gave it to them, and they bought a cup of coffee instead, would you be mad?

I've never really understood why my family hated me
But I know they did
All of them
Right from the start
That's why

Yeah