Freedom

he drank wine all night
The night of the 28th, and he kept thinking of her
the way she walked and talked and loved
the way she told him things that seemed true
but were not,
and he knew the color of each of her dresses
and her shoes-
He knew the stock and curve of
each heel as well as the leg shaped by it.

and she was out again and when he came home,
and she'd come back with that special stink again, and she did
she came in at 3 a.m in the morning, filthy like a dung eating swine
and he took out a butchers knife and she screamed
backing into the rooming house wall still pretty somehow in spite of love's reek
and he finished the glass of wine

that yellow dress his favorite
and she screamed again.

and he took up the knife
and unhooked his belt
and tore away the cloth before her
and cut off his balls.

and carried them in his hands
like apricots
and flushed them down the
toilet bowl
and she kept screaming
as the room became red

GOD O GOD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?
and he sat there holding 3 towels between his legs
not caring now whether she left or stayed
wore yellow or green or anything at all
and one hand holding and one hand
lifting he poured
another wine