Flaming Youth

[Intro]
(The university has traditionally been the birthplace
Of bold ideas, brave new concepts, revolutionary movements
Dedicated to man's never-ending quest for knowledge
And today here in America students are reaching new highs
In a movement bent upon the discovery of more advanced
Even daring new ways to expand the minds of men)

[Verse 1]
Every good hard-working student in our colleges today
Has joined a great new movement which is currently underway
You take anything at all that strikes your fancy
Fry it, bake it, soak it
Chop it up in tiny little pieces
Put it in your pipe and smoke it (Yeah)

[Verse 2]
At MIT the kids are puffin' on bananas
I said bananas, I mean bananas
And at Purdue the kids are puffin' on petunias
Potted petunias but old petunias

[Verse 3]
And we just heard those Ivy Leaguers down in Princeton
Livin' in their ivy-covered halls
Spend all their carefree hours
Smokin' the ivy right off the walls
Pa, pa-pa, pa-pa-pa-pa-pa

[Verse 4]
The football player used to be the campus hero
That kind of feeling now is terribly passé
The hero now is a bloke who finds somethin' new to smoke
That's how it is today
Boom like a chew, boom like a chow
Let's try dog food, bow-wow-wow

[Verse 5]
We hear in Florida the students are on grapefruit
They're chauvinistic, so they smoke grapefruit
We hear at Norte Dame that mighty football college
They're smokin' footballs (real pigskins), oh leather footballs

[Verse 6]
And we just heard a week ago in Minnesota
When the sun came up and brought the dawn
You could see students by the hundreds
Smokin' up the dean's front lawn
Pa, pa-pa, pa-pa-pa-pa-pa

[Verse 7]
Why it's the biggest thing since Harvard men ate goldfish
'Cause all the college kids throughout the USA
Are marchin' along, singin' a song
Smoke something new today

[Bridge]
Hail to thee, dear alma mater, grateful will I be
For the ways of good, clean livin' that I learned with thee
Any time the road grew weary or the work seemed dull
I'd be in the dormitory stoned out of my skull

[Verse 8]
We hear at NYU the students are on nutmeg
Old fashioned nutmeg, hey Merry Christmas, yes
We hear at Yale the fellows go for pink carnations
You know those Yale men, pink carnations

[Verse 9]
We hear at Georgia Tech they stormed the loser's goalpost
And when they eventually broke it
It fell to the ground, and a voice cried out
"Let's grind the damn thing up and smoke it"
Pa, pa-pa, pa-pa-pa-pa-pa

[Verse 10]
It sure is makin' every father feel terrific
When he considers how much loot he has to pay
So that his dear little sprout can have a chance to cry out
"Hip-hip-hooray, hip-hip-hooray, I smoked something new today"