Flames of Disaster

[Part I: Glorious Warrior]

[Intro: Julian Barratt, Adam Pally & Christopher Lloyd]
On a glorious quest
"Hello, Wade"
"Jack?"
For glory, yes!
With his hands of stone
And knees that never buckle (Wah)
Come and witness the tale
Of the warrior Knuckles, yeah
"Uh, what is Jack Sinclair doing here?"
"Clearly you two have unfinished business"
"Ah, yeah, no fair point. He does have me locked up in a giant cage right now"
And now we begin our quest

[Verse 1: Julian Barratt, Adam Pally & Andy Heath]
When our hero was only a lad
He was trained by the greatest, his dad
Had the technique and also the guts
He prepared to kick multiple butts (Yeah)
But the giant owls, they did come
They had one mission to kill everyone
Knuckles and Dad didn't know what to do
Yes, they were doomed
The owls, they clawed and they kicked
They hooted and flew into fits
They set fire to the town and burned it to the ground
I'm so freaking upset, I can't sing about it
"Father, you can't leave me"
"I won't son. I never— *groans and dies*"
"No!"

[Verse 2: Julian Barratt & Adam Pally]
Some things can't be fixed, even with big gloves
Saddest story that you ever heard of
"Can I go to the bathroom?"
"No, we're doing something"
"I really gotta go"
"Tough"

[Verse 3: Julian Barratt]
Now Knuckles was sad and alone
Without a father and without a home
(The giant owls killed his dad)
So off on his own, he just needed the power

[Chorus: Michael Bolton & Julian Barratt]
I will find the flames of disaster
(Michael Bolton, everyone)
A glorious quest, for glory
I need to find the flames of disaster
A glorious quest, for glory (Yeah)

[Verse 4: Julian Barratt]
But the power was no simple task
Too many obstacles lay in his path
Stinking to high heaven, needing a bath
That's when he saw the demon made of fire and ash
Who said—

[Verse 5: Julian Barratt]
I'm gonna burn you alive 'til you're crisp
Then boil your bones and eat you like a fish
Then I might hit Facebook Marketplace up
Might be some deals on some freaking cool stuff

[Verse 6: Julian Barratt]
But our hero went back to the start
Saw that the strength was deep inside his hear—

[Part II: Warrior’s Heart]

[Intro: Julian Barratt]
Yahoo-hoo!
(Yow!)
Are you ready? Let's go

[Verse 1: Julian Barratt]
But the demon was not impressed by the puny red guy before him
He looked down and rolled his eyes, and then without any warning
Oh, my God!
He used magic and lava, and before you even knew it
Knuckles was defeated, his mission uncompleted
He totally freakin' blew it
Oh, my God!
Broken and vanquished, our hero lay on the ground
As the demon screamed out
"You're going down"

[Refrain: Julian Barratt]
Unskilled, untrained, so unworthy
Unskilled, untrained, so unworthy
Unskilled, untrained, so unworthy
You suck
You freaking suck
And now I'm afraid this is the end of your story

[Verse 2: Michael Bolton & Julian Barratt]
Is it too late to find out where my strength lies?
I didn't feel it in my bones when I flew high
It wasn't in the lightning coursing off of my skin
Could a warrior’s true strength come from within?
(Michael Bolton, everyone)

[Verse 3: Julian Barratt & Michael Bolton]
And just when everyone counted him out
Knuckles rose up with a furious shout
"Take heed demon, you've entered our final fight
Now prepare for my glorious might"
"You fool, only I can be the power's master"
"No, you're wrong
'Cause now I wield the flames of disaster!"

[Outro: Julian Barratt & Michael Bolton]
It wasn't even close when our boy got going
A royal beatdown with flame-fists a-glowing
I had this power right from the start
But now I know that true strength lies in a warrior's heart!