Fear

[Verse 1: Boondox]
Visions of my children wiping tears from open eyes
As they kneel beside my coffin family say their last goodbyes
But it's the faces of my babies got me trippin' thanking God for breath
Expressions filled with pain has got me strappin on the vest
And I know that I ain't living right I hang on borrowed time
And this life's gone leave them bastards cause their pops has got to grind
Little mouths have got to eat so I hug them, hit the streets
Splitting time with them and money got me feelin incomplete
And I ain't scared of any mothafucka fight the flames of hell
But a child without his dad has got me hiding in my shell
Got me shakin' in my boots to see them face this world alone
Are the strong enough to cope stuck in half a fuckin' home
As I lay them down to sleep it's all on me their soul to keep
And if I die before I wake up
I pray to God he's up there waitin'
With an army full of angels strapped with gats cause I'm defying
Since I first became a father only fear I have is dying

[Hook]
This situation has got me losing sleep
I cannot eat
I'm feeling weak the fear has got me
On my knees
The fear has got me
X2

[Verse 2: Blaze Ya Dead Homie]
After all that I have ever done
And all that you will ever see from life
Death beyond the grave how will they remember me
I only fear the lost of my voice
When it's gone The only noise is the pen
I'm a writer by choice
I can cut my tounge clean off and smoke myself toothless
I still be on the mic spittin' shit they call ruthless
The truth is
I go deaf dumb and blind in one ear
And be the dopest deaf, dumb and blind guy you ever hear
I ain't scared of dyin or death, I've been there
Rotting in the ground in the pine box for many years
My return ain't a form of reincarnation
I'm a walking buddy men
Don't get it lost in a translation
And with a loss of expression
Pleased with depression
The thoughts with everything ending is what I'm guessing
Raising light at the ending ain't no been ain't no bow
If I go we all go as the bomb I'm carrying will explode

[Hook]

[Verse 3: Monoxide]
Eyes open but I don't remember much
I try to focus but the light is bright as fuck
I go to sit up but I'm strapped and stuck
Stuck panic can't say nothin' like my jaw is wired shut
How the fuck did get to where I am is still a mystery
My memories not assistin' me as I lay here in misery
Literally hopin' that somebody will give me some kind of time
Am I dead or alive? This a dream or a sign?
Is there a chance that I can find my mind and rewind
But they paint me behind blinds and find somethin
It's like a game and nobody told me we we're playin
And the fact that I don't know if I'm alive and sane
And inside my brain only one thing remains
The fear of not knowing, paralyzes almost everthing
Any second can be my last breath
And my best guess is nothin' with no memories left
I'm sorry

[Hook]