Fake Tweed Dad

He bought a four by four
That he doesn't need
Succumbed to the pressures
Of modern society
Moved down here cuz the air is nice and clean
And give his kids a good upbringing

He bought a suit made
Entirely out of tweed
Moved to the country
But wellies are always clean

Fake Tweed Dad
Moved from London to the country side
Fake Tweed Dad
Changed his appearance overnight
Fake Tweed Dad
Just look around and you find
A fake tweed Dad

He got a working dog
That he didn't train
Tried to re-home it
After only a few days
He bought a house and
Paid for it in cash
Gazumped the locals
Now we can't afford that

A pint of cider
And now he's on his knees
Brand new combine harvester
But won't give me the keys

Fake Tweed Dad
Moved from London to the country side
Fake Tweed Dad
Changed his appearance overnight
Fake Tweed Dad
Just look around and you find
A fake tweed Dad

Ah yes, I was thinking of going peasant shooting this weekend
Yes, I said peasant but the weathers a bit grim and didn't want my wellies to get muddy you know!
Yes, the schools are good around here
But it's a shame about the locals

Fake Tweed Dad
Fake Tweed Dad
Fake Tweed Dad
Fake Tweed Dad

He bought a suit made
Entirely out of tweed
Moved to the country
But wellies are always clean

Fake Tweed Dad
Moved from London to the country side
Fake Tweed Dad
Changed his appearance overnight
Fake Tweed Dad
Just look around and you find
A fake tweed Dad