Exercising Some Control

I've got a dog he's like a two ton frog
I call him 'some control'
Yesterday I took him for his walkies in the park
He's a beautiful thundering soul
At first he never took a fancy to any one passing by
Until a big fat cop came into his sights
And he had to know the reason why
So he took his little piece out of the gentleman's leg
And the gentleman was sore surprised
And limping up to me he whispered quietly
"what are you playing at?"
"I'm exercising some control, I said
"Exercising some control
Exercising some control."

When I awoke I gave myself a poke
To make sure that I was still alive
I noticed I was standing in a courtroom with a judge
So I thought I'd better show him how to jive
As I was freaking out with my fancy
The judge said, "Give us a kiss"
I said, "Oh dear, that's a little bit queer
I think I'll have to give this one a miss."

But just as I was planning on a trip to the moon
In my everlasting rubber John
He said "OK Mutton Jeff— it's no good acting deaf
Fined twenty quid you creep
For exercising some control"
Exercising some control
Exercising some control

Underneath the washing powder headlines
We'll meet at ten past nine
You can do a clog-dance on the top of my chapatti
I don't care no more
About exercising some control
Swimming in the tadpole bowl
Whilst drinking in the tadpole bowl
Leaking in the tadpole bowl
Exercising some control