Ever Know

Seen me at my worst, so pitiful
Does having this disease make you criminal
Help me keep a balance, I'm so cynical
Why you love me, don't think I'll ever know
Seen me at my worst, so pitiful
Does having this disease make you criminal
Help me keep a balance, I'm so cynical
Why you love me, don't think I'll ever know

Yeah
Sometimes I wish I kept you as a friend
Didn't have to ruin what was good to begin
But I was way too high, and selfish to pretend
Always have love for Spooky cause I met you thru him, damn
Just thinking 'bout the past gives me spins
As I'm sippin' on this Tanqueray gin
Trippin' whilе I'm dusted, used to blow it in the wind
Usеd to tell myself she much better off with a king
That's something that used to fuck with me baby, you wouldn't know
It's cause I never let my insecurities show
Your love always my chemical of choice when life is cold
Thought that I'd end up somewhere dead or up in a hole
Know that it's certain, cause I done had my future told
How I ain't famous, when my soul already been sold
Pain is a language that I understand more than most
Agony, anguish always turned me into a ghost
Into a ghost
Don't get too close
Don't wanna repeat all the mistakes I chose
Loved me with my shattered lips and powdered nose
When just about all of my clothes was full of holes
Resentment grows
The truth exposed
But I can't let you go, and let this chapter close
Cause what you did to me that night ain't even close
To what I put you through for years when I let the devil impose, blowing my o's

Seen me at my worst, so pitiful
Does having this disease make you criminal
Help me keep a balance, I'm so cynical
Why you love me, don't think I'll ever know
Seen me at my worst, so pitiful
Does having this disease make you criminal
Help me keep a balance, I'm so cynical
Why you love me, don't think I'll ever know

Ever know
Seen you at your worst
Don't forget who held it down when you was broken, boy
Your love is a curse, ripped it all apart, now
Who you think made me, stone cold
All the midnight calls
All the midnight talks
Every single night, I had my back against the wall
Now you think that I don't know
The way you move, the way you touching me so slow
This game you played with me, when I held you so close
Loving you is something that I'll never know how to
Heal from, learn from
Know how to get a move on with my life
This is, a part of us, we'll never be able to deny

Seen me at my worst, so pitiful
Does having this disease make you criminal
Help me keep a balance, I'm so cynical
Why you love me, don't think I'll ever know
Seen me at my worst, so pitiful
Does having this disease make you criminal
Help me keep a balance, I'm so cynical
Why you love me, don't think I'll ever know