Equal in my Tea

I met a girl today
She treats me like the finest mexican wine
I like mexican wine
Then I asked this little flower
If she would be all mine
She said, "Hell no!
I need a man to treat me
Like a queen all day and night
Need a man with money, style
Power, prospects
A man looking for a wife"
And I said, "Bitch! Just wanted a kiss
You've got yourself an unrealistic wish
Looking for a man who's all that and a bag of chips
Well I must have struck a chord or something
Cause pretty soon our hearts was thumpin
She grabbed me by the hips
And we locked lips
I didn't know it, but I'd found my future wife
She gave my heart it's stint
And gave my eyes their sight
Hey baby, you're the equal in my tea
Hey honey, you can take as long as you need
To satisfy me
And this little thing
She told me she pregnant with my baby
And that's for sure
And I say, "what you gonna do?"
And she say, "hmmm
Well I don't know
I feel so scared and all alone"
And I say, "Girl, you've got me
And that's for sure."
I didn't know it but I had found my future wife
She gave my dog it's feed
And gave my daughter life
Hey baby, you're the equal in my tea
Hey honey, you can take your sweet time to satisfy me
The army drafted me
The war became my life
I feel the worst down here
But God is on our side
Hey baby, you're the air in my flat tire
Hey honey, I've seen men sent home by being struck by friendly fire
I met a man today
He told me the secret to the Mid East peace resolve
"You've got to let that man-made problem self devolve"
"As for Iraq, they're just lines on a map
Jotted down by some limey wanker for sure
Sharing a long-hearted laugh about the Kurds"
I knew right then this man was quite the bitter fruit
He knew my mute view
That his love would follow suit
Hey stranger, you've got moxie out the ass
Hey buddy, these yankee Franks
You know their empire won't last