Dust and Ashes

[PIERRE]
Is this how I die?
Ridiculed and laughed at
Wearing clown shoes
Is this how I die?
Furious and reckless
Sick with booze

How did I live?
I taste every wasted minute
Every time I turned away
From the things that might have healed me
How long have I been sleeping?

Is this how I die?
Frightened like a child
Lazy and numb
Is this how I die?
Pretending and preposterous
And dumb

How did I live?
Was I kind enough and good enough?
Did I love enough?
Did I ever look up
And see the moon
And the stars
And the sky?
Oh why have I been sleeping?

They say we are asleep
Until we fall in love
We are children of dust and ashes
But when we fall in love we wake up
And we are a God
And angels weep
But if I die here tonight
I die in my sleep

All of my life I spent searching the words
Of poets and saints and prophets and kings
And now at the end all I know that I’ve learned
Is that all that I know is I don’t know a thing

So easy to close off
Place the blame outside
Hiding in my room at night
So terrified
All the things I could have been
But I never had the nerve
Life and love
I don’t deserve

So all right, all right
I’ve had my time
Close my eyes
Let the death bells chime
Bury me in burgundy
I just don’t care
Nothing’s left
I looked everywhere

Is this how I die?
Was there ever any other way my life could be?
Is this how I die?
Such a storm of feelings inside of me?

But then why am I screaming?
Why am I shaking?
Oh God, was there something that I missed?
Did I squander my divinity?
Was happiness within me the whole time?

They say we are asleep
Until we fall in love
We are children of dust and ashes
But when we fall in love we wake up
And we are a God
And angels weep
But if I die here tonight
I die in my sleep

They say we are asleep
Until we fall in love
And I’m so ready
To wake up now

I want to wake up
Don’t let me die while I’m like this
I want to wake up
God don’t let me die while I’m like this
Please let me wake up now
God don’t let me die while I’m like this
I’m ready
I’m ready
To wake up